Joe Biden: Let me say a few things before I take your questions. As you know, the Special Counsel released its finding today. About the look into my handling of classified documents. (coughs.)

On page 215, if you had a chance, I know it’s a long, it’s a thick document. On page 215, they reported Special Counsel found the exact opposite. Here’s what he wrote, “There is in fact a shortage of evidence that I willfully retained classified materials related to Afghanistan.” On page 12, a Special Counsel also wrote for another document, “The decision to decline criminal charges was straightforward, the evidence suggests that Mr. Biden did not willfully retain these documents.” The evidence said I did NOT willfully retain these documents!

Joe Biden: In addition, I know there’s some attention paid to some language in the report about my recollection of events – it was even referenced that I don’t remember when my son died. How in the hell dare he raise that? Frankly, when I was asked the question, I thought to myself, it wasn’t any of their damn business. Let me tell you something. Some of you have commented, I wear, since the day he died, every single day, the rosary he got from Our Lady of….. (trails off).

[Note: He clearly cannot remember the name of the Catholic Saint.]

Joe Biden: The bottom line is… the matter is NOW CLOSED! I’m to continue what I’ve always focused on, my job of being president of the United States of America. And I thank you, and I’ll take some questions.

Journalist Peter Doocy: President Biden, something Special Counsel said in his report is that one of the reasons you were not charged is because in his description, you are a well-meaning elderly man with a poor memory.

Joe: I’m well-meaning and I’m an elderly man and I know what the hell I’m doin’, I’m the president and I put this country back on its feet! I don’t need his recommendation, that’s totally…

Journalist Peter Doocy: How bad is your memory? And can you continue as president?

Joe: My memory is so bad, I ev, I let you speak! (Joe holds his hand out waiting for laughter that doesn’t come.) That, that says that... (gets interrupted)

Female journalist: Do you think your memory has gotten worse?

Joe: Now look. My memory’s not, my memory is fine. My memory… take a look at what I’ve done since I’ve become president! None of you thought I could pass any of the things I got passed! How’d that happen?? You know, I guess I just forgot what was goin’ on.

(Sounds of competing journalists shouting questions)

Journalist: Mr. President, Mr. President, the voters have concerns about your age, how are you going to persuade them and do you fear that this report will be going to fuel further concerns about your age?

Joe: Only by some of you. (Shouting and jockeying take place among the journalists to ask the next question)

Journalist: Mr. President, do you take responsibility for at least being careless with classified material?

Joe: I take responsibility for not having seen exactly what my staff was doing. It goes in and it’s twice out (?) Things that appeared in my garage, things that came out of my home, things that were moved, were moved not by me but my staff, by my staff.

(More shouting and jockeying takes place among the journalists to ask the next question)

Journalist: Mr. President for months when you were asked about your age, you would respond with the words, “Watch me!”

Joe: (nods in agreement) Watch me!

Journalist: Many American people have been watching and they have expressed concerns about your age…

Joe: (Joe loudly interrupts and points at the Journalist) That is your judgment! That is your judgment! That is not the judgment of the press! (?)

Journalist: They express concerns about your mental acuity they say that you are too old. Mr. President, in December you told me that you believe there are many other Democrats who could defeat Donald Trump so why does it have to be you now? Why? What is your answer?

Joe: Because I am the most qualified person in this country to be president of the United States and will finish the job I started!

Joe: ... I’m of the view, as you know that the conduct of the response in Gaza, in the Gaza Strip has been ‘over the top’. I think that uh, as you know, initially the president of Mexico, CeeCee (?) did not want to open up the gate to allow humanitarian material to get in.

[NOTE: President Biden is confused and mistaken when he said "Mexico." There is no Mexican president with the nickname ‘CeeCee’. Mexico's president is named Andrés Manuel López Obrador. However, Egypt's Abdel Fattah el-Sissi, might be whom he meant, and of course Israel’s president does have the nickname BiBi.]

Joe: There’s also a negotiations you may recall. In the very beginning, right after, right before Hamas attacked, I was in contact with the Saudis and others, to work out a deal where they would recognize Israel’s right to exist. Let them make them part of the Middle East and recognize them fully in return for certain things, that the United states would commit to do.

(Is Joe saying that we taxpayers are give our adversaries concessions and military equipment to benefit Israel??)

Joe: The commitment to that we were proposing to do related to, to two items, I’m not going to go in detail, but one of them was to deal with the protection against their arch enemy to the northwest, ah northeast I should say.

[Note: Yes. Joe is saying the U.S. would commit to concessions to other countries including offering military supplies and assistance to protect them without telling the U.S. citizens or Congress what is involved and what we would be giving away to give Israel special favors.]