Lol but seriously, there are parasites that intentionally influence the host's decisions. Rabies wants to spread so it makes its host salivate and infects the brain to release a chemical to make the animal more likely to bite. Many parasites infect the hosts brain to make them go towards predators so that the parasite has a bigger host. The story I read was anecdotal but it was basically that the guy's brother took ivermectin for an unrelated infection and had no idea he'd been infected with intestinal parasites that feed on fecal matter; it immediately cured him and he started liking girls again. Who knows how true it is but that idea makes sense, given the nature of other parasites we know about. A parasite could theoretically affect someone's decisions to put them in a situation where the parasite is able to reproduce or spread.

This theory that homosexuality is caused by intestinal parasites is worth investigating further.