Our son was sober for 5 years. He contracted cellulitis back in February. His leg swelled to 5+ times its normal size so the docs in the hospital had him on a cocktail of meds, including pain killers. They knew his history but had to put him on the pain meds. Well, yesterday, he was arrested. He had meth and heroin. He had lost a lot of weight with the cellulitis after his 1 month hospital stay. He comes over on Fridays when my husband always fries fish. He seemed normal but I asked him if he was on drugs because of his weight loss and he told me no and that he'd take a drug test. I should have tested him but trusted he was being truthful.
Our hearts are shattered. He called earlier wanting us to bail him out but we told him no. I told him he was the one who made the decision to start taking drugs again and that he has to face the consequences of his poor choices. He threatened to hang himself. I told him that wouldn't solve anything but if he made that choice we were not responsible and we sure as hell would not feel guilty. He hung up. He tried to call again but now, I've turned off my phone. He'll have a hearing next week and hopefully the judge will decide that he can go to rehab before his trial and whatever time he is given.
Anyway, I know firsthand from previous asks that your prayers are powerful. Asking for our son and for our family. Thanks so much!
I am praying for you and for your son. As a recovering addict and a parent, I just want you to know Tough love is the best love. It also takes more commitment than just giving in. I did it and it broke my heart doing it.But I saved my son by forcing him into consequences. My whole heart is with you. ❤️🙏❤️🙏😥
Thank you, Nana. It is ripping out our hearts. So much easier to give in but I've learned that giving in is giving up and we just won't.
You are so correct that giving in is giving up. When we are not allowed to grow, we wither and the worst storms make the strongest trees. I wish we could save them all. I truly do. I just couldn't ever live with myself if I spent all my time interrupting another person's growth. And sadly that very much includes the consequences of their actions. It's real love that respects another enough to let them make their own path. Praying for all the prodigal sons; may they return safer and wiser to their rightful places in their families.