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Subway Names Diddy As New Spokesman (babylonbee.com)

posted 1 year ago by ashlanddog 1 year ago by ashlanddog +39 / -0

Subway Names Diddy As New Spokesman

U.S. — The Subway sandwich franchise has excitedly announced its newest spokesman, Sean "Diddy" Combs.

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– Merkava_4 4 points 1 year ago +4 / -0

I should mention that I got horrific food poisoning at Subway. It was their "Spicy Italian" sandwich.

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– ashlanddog [S] 1 point 1 year ago +1 / -0

"I should mention that I got horrific food poisoning at Subway. "

...you needed to get "extra oil"...

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– Merkava_4 2 points 1 year ago +2 / -0

Everything came out through my mouth into the bathtub. And I had to do that twice.

My ribs were super sore from all the dry heaving afterwards.

We're talking about some of the most ruthless e-coli known to man.

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– ashlanddog [S] 1 point 1 year ago +1 / -0

"Everything came out through my mouth into the bathtub."

...the "extra oil" would have provided needed lubrication...

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– Merkava_4 2 points 1 year ago +2 / -0

It was under intense high pressure. I didn't know my body could do that. Amazing.

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