Democrats are the last ones on the planet who still think it’s okay to bash people because of the color of their skin, and that’s just wrong. Orange people are people, too. The snippy commentators on CNN and MSMBC would have you believe that the orange community is the source of all badness, but to paint orange people with such a broad brush is grossly unfair. Sure, one might be able to find some rotten fruit in the bunch, but by and large, oranges just want what everyone else wants, the ability to raise their families in peace without the government always telling them what to do or making them poor by giving all the money away (which mostly comes back to politicians through money laundering schemes they call infrastructure projects, healthcare initiatives, wars of liberation, and group-specific welfare).

The most egregious example of racism from Democrats is, of course, the unending excoriation of a notable orange person in the government, simply because of the color of his skin. We all know who that is, but to be fair, the fact that The Great Orange One got in their sandbox and immediately started breaking all their nasty toys might have had something to do with it. He left Washington after they tried to steal an election he won by a landslide, and they just can’t let it go. He is orange, and therefore he is bad, so bad that his badness must still be discussed, and it must be discussed in a way that makes everything the Democrats continue to screw up his fault. Just stop already. Your insane hatred accomplishes nothing. Enjoy this time of having no orange man in the spotlight provoking you to wear yourselves out with hateful, red-eyed, fingernail-on-the-chalkboard tirades. His absence is only temporary, you cheating lying scoundrels, not that you will be able to return to spew your racist hatred.

The Great Orange One caught you doing very bad things, and you know it. Justice is coming, and it will not be kind. On that day no snarky MSNBC commentator will be seen bashing orange people with an angry foam of spittle building on bitter downturned fish lips. No more CNN anchors of questionable gender will be spinning in their chairs like tops to explain once again why something an orange man said must be wrong after it was proven he was right. No more will boozy old Democratic politicians or goofy clueless new ones get away with telling lies about their orange colleagues in public. No more will a Hollywood star be heard spouting vacuous anti-orange nonsense as if pretending for a living made he, she, or “it” someone important. The orange community will rejoice as you, along with the ones who own you and the ones for whom you shill, wither to dust from lack of the cruel potions the Great Orange One took from you when he liberated the unfortunate children from which those evil concoctions are made. On that day people will no longer be censored from the internet for saying something orange, and anti-orange legislation will never again have the slightest chance of passing in congress or in any statehouse.

This is the beginning of a true color revolution, but it will not be one that promotes slavery or one that quickly devolves into tyranny. It will be one that brings freedom, an Orange Revolution that will be for everybody, the orange and the non-orange alike; so get ahead of the curve, Democrats, and let go of your racism while there is still time. There will be no room for your anti-orange sentiment in the age that will soon emerge amidst the ashes of your thwarted Pinky-and-the-Brain plans to take over the world.