The power of fathers is undeniable. In Life Without Father, Dr. David Popenoe writes, “Involved fathers—especially biological fathers—bring positive benefits to their children that no other person is as likely to bring.” Research continues to pile up proving this; 82% of father-involvement studies since 1980 have found “significant associations between positive father involvement and offspring well-being.”
Children with strong, active fathers do better. This shows up in surprising ways. For example, there is evidence that a father’s overall fitness (not the mother’s) is the best indicator of a child’s future physical health. We see similar correlation in the area of academics, in vocabulary, and even in spiritual condition.
Back in '03, Robbie Lowe wrote a helpful article in Touchstone on the Importance of Fathers to Churchgoing. In it, he explains:
"In 1994 the Swiss carried out an extra survey that the researchers for our masters in Europe (I write from England) were happy to record. The question was asked to determine whether a person’s religion carried through to the next generation, and if so, why, or if not, why not. The result is dynamite. There is one critical factor. It is overwhelming, and it is this: It is the religious practice of the father of the family that, above all, determines the future attendance at or absence from church of the children."
But doesn’t the mother’s influence matter? Lowe comments:
"In terms of commitment, a mother’s role may be to encourage and confirm, but it is not primary to her adult offspring’s decision. Mothers’ choices have dramatically less effect upon children than their fathers’, and without him she has little effect on the primary lifestyle choices her offspring make in their religious observances."
Even long before scientific studies, churchmen knew the straight connection between fathers and the well-being of their households. J. Alexander, for example, preached that:
"There is no member of a household whose individual piety is of such importance to all the rest as the father or head. And there is no one whose soul is so directly influenced by the exercise of domestic worship. Where the head of a family is lukewarm or worldly, he will send the chill through the whole house."
There is no chill like the cold reality of a fatherless home. Its icy effects are sobering. In his book Fatherless Generation, J. Sowers reports that children from fatherless homes account for:
63% of youth suicides 71% of all high school dropouts 71% of pregnant teenagers 85% of all youth who exhibit behavior disorder 85% of all youths sitting in prison 90% of all homeless and runaway teenagers etc
As a father goes, so goes the household. And as the household goes, so goes society. The benevolent presence of a father results in a more orderly and fruitful life. His absence, whether by distance or abdication, results in disorder and chaos.
The great need of our age is a revival of fatherhood.
Amen. Our earthly fathers as well as our Heavenly Father. What better father's are there? "Teach a child the way to go and he will not forsake it."
Great post!
I read a similar post a little over three months ago, and I wrote this reply:
ALL boys need a father to teach them to be a man. We used to have strong male teachers, great coaches, boy scouts, youth ministers, and neighborhood police officers. Boys had real life male roll models. Now they have rap thugs and sports stars who are dumber than a box of rocks.
The Pilanesberg National Park had a fatherless group of young male elephants viscously attacking the park’s other inhabitants. Over 50 badly mutilated rhino carcasses were discovered. The group of young rogue elephants were uncharacteristically agressive and angry. The wildlife park was in chaos.
Finnally, a doctor named Gus Van Dyk figured out the problem. In the late 1970s, Pilanesberg National Park had been seeded with elephants from other national parks, like Kruger. Huge bull elephants were extremely difficult to transport, so young males, females and babies were introduced. As a result, there were no older bull elephants.
Dr. Gus introduced six large bulls from Kruger National Park, who towered over the adolescents, and literally within hours, the teen thugs had dropped out of musth (aggressive state). No more animals were killed by rampaging youngsters.
This musth story was used in an American academic paper as an example in human adolescence of the importance of a stable society and a father figure to provide boundaries for teen males. The young males that were getting into these elephant gangs had no template of good social behavior and were at the mercy of their rampaging hormones, which was putting them at as much risk as those around them. (Father's also teach their girls self respect!)
"Male toxicity" is bullshit. We desperately NEED strong men.
Absolutely right! Not soy boys with man buns, make-up etc - or trannies. Real, dependable, mature men, able to be role models and caring family heads. Godly men.
This is why the left has always wanted to replace the father with the government, it has been incentivized over time.
Children need fathers; society needs families with fathers. Fatherhood will revive on its own if family law is reformed, removing the boot from fathers' necks. The feds have used economic coercion to push states to rubber-stamp this hidden form of slavery impressed on any man unfortunate enough to get caught up in it. A woman in today's western society who respects a man's role and never succumbs to the temptation of greedy entitlement is a blessing indeed.
First off, thank you for the post. It is spot-on.
My dad died before I turned 16. My mom was incapacitated by our loss, extended family dissolved because my dad was everyones rock, my brother (few years older than me) moved out. I had no guidance.
In stepped my neighbor who my brother and I worked weekends for since we could push a lawnmower. He was laid back but wouldn't accept slacking, when we were on-the-clock we had to be doing our best work, when we were given a task he was always patient and willing to teach us how to do it properly.
When I graduated high school, he hired me at his company. Gave me a company car, budget, and taught me how to sincerely listen and interact with people as an adult.
Needless to say I messed that all up by getting drunk and totalling the company car. The hardest decision that I ever made was to call myself into the police and report the crash. The next morning, I called him and told him what happened. We didn't speak for a year.
Fast forward 15ish years, he lives across the country from me but any time that I need advice, he picks up the phone. Any time he comes back to town, he gives me a heads up and my family and his go out to dinner and spend hours talking.
Without my dad raising me, and my old boss stepping in when my dad died, I'd probably be in jail or dead. I would have never found the love of my life and have the best daughter. I'm doing my best to follow in the footsteps of the men who taught me. Without their imprints in the dirt, I'd be lost and not know what direction to go.
It doesn't need to be your biological father who shows you the way, just a man who loves you and wants you to succeed.
You were sent an angel across your path, greatly blessed. A good, kind mentor is a huge help in such circumstances. Fortunately, I had a wonderful dad until we were parted when I was young and a mother like older friend who taught me a lot. Very blessed.
Very good and timely post!
As Above, so below.
Men get royally screwed over in every direction. Then people wonder why no one is having kids, raising families or getting married. It's a raw deal to mess with women and then she brings the boot of the government with her at every turn.
The laws must be fixed first, before any smart men get back to having families.