About half a year ago I confessed to my church community that I am struggling with SSA and posted here on GAW. From there I have been in a 12 step recovery program called Re:Generation. First I must start with I still have this attraction and that is okay, but I am no longer acting on my flesh (No longer seeking Homosexual relations/Porn). I have been searching for the root of my sin nature and have found some connections so far. I did not feel wanted/desired or understood by men in my life growing up, and was sexually abused by a male cousin. Long story short, I see that I used sex as a way to gain that want/desire and understanding from men. Which I felt Wanted/Desired when I was abused. This is a huge eye opening link to what may be what started this sin nature in me. While I have not seen a change in my attraction, like I mentioned I am no longer acting on this sin nature of mine. God is 100% capable of changing this in me, I will not deny His power. But as say to my church family walking with me, I need to first be okay with the idea that I may never be over this attraction, never have a relationship, and never have sexual "gratification" again. This may be the thorn in my side The Lord uses to remind me of where he has taken me, or the thorn may be removed and I can have children and a family that I want to have some day.
I just wanted to give an update for those who have seen my previous post on here. For those who are still active in SSA I am not judging you, I love you all and pray God reveals himself to you as He has done to me. Im not asking for you all to do what I am doing but to just get to know the Father, Son, and Spirit.
Thank you for reading this, any and all of you. Keep me in your prayers. God is great and may His will be done, not my own.
I have often thought that SSA is on a continuum, with some more strongly affected than others. Events in our lives may push us to one end of the continuum or the other. I think those with a strong SSA have a particularly difficult burden or cross to bear in this lifetime. Jesus is there helping you with your cross. Prayers for your journey.
I can't understand why what sex you are attracted to has to do with Right vs Wong, Right choices vs Wrong choices.
I am extremely attracted to money. That does not mean that I am going to let it rule my life. It does not mean that I am going to go out and rob a bank to obtain it.
If we allowed our nature to rule our lives most of us would be criminals of some sort or another. We have a will to do what is right. Robert E. Lee, probably one of the greatest men of history as far as his character when asked, "What does it take to be a great man" said "Deny thy self". Surely he was talking about denying oneself the passions of our natures, the pleasure attendant to our carnal desires, deny our slothful tendencies.
We do not have to be guided by our sexual desires over and above all other facets of life is what I'm saying. A man doesn't have to be driven to the point of abandoning and destroying an entire family simply because he got it in his head that he likes dick more than pussy. Is sex, and our attraction to one sex or the other so the most important thing in life. I say Hell No, and this is coming from a man who spend his adult life up till around 30 sleeping with a different woman every night , thousands of them.