Did you know that whales and dolphins are mammals?

Rumor has it they got on land, evolved lungs, saw drag queen story hour reading a book about how men can get abortions too, and then immediately "fuck this shit, I'm out"ed right back into the ocean, but not before singeing their arms and legs back into flippers so they would never be tempted to turn the pages on "why my innie is an outie" ever again.

But most importantly, anatomically speaking, their buttholes are now in the front.

So, yeah. It's very ass-backwards.