Necessary addition: You're exactly right that no amount of love GIVEN LATER ON will fix neurosis (no matter the symptoms: depression, addiction, whatever).
Can't fix trauma from childhood with warmth and love IN ADULTHOOD. Plenty of people try to do that; sex addiction is an obvious and extreme example.
Old traumatic events MUST be brought to full consciousness to resolve, otherwise they remain, pristine, waiting to BE experienced -- and the system can only handle them in fire-alarm mode because they were, by definition, serious and threatening. THAT is what's being repressed.
Absent bringing the events to full consciousness (actually "becoming as a little child" -- the child that was being traumatized; letting oneself become weak in order to feel pain, draining it OUT of the system so that one can be strong in the present) -- absent that, what is left is trying to strengthen defenses (better nutrition can help) and to strengthen them in ways less damaging -- getting into exercise and sports instead of drinking a lot and getting into fistfights; studying [anything non-toxic] instead of consuming junk media; taking up boxing or martial arts instead of taking old feelings out on the wife or kids.
Just shifting to more positive actions in life can be very effective -- for MANY people, but far from all. Each person is different.
Necessary addition: You're exactly right that no amount of love GIVEN LATER ON will fix neurosis (no matter the symptoms: depression, addiction, whatever).
Can't fix trauma from childhood with warmth and love IN ADULTHOOD. Plenty of people try to do that; sex addiction is an obvious and extreme example.
Old traumatic events MUST be brought to full consciousness to resolve, otherwise they remain, pristine, waiting to BE experienced -- and the system can only handle them in fire-alarm mode because they were, by definition, serious and threatening. THAT is what's being repressed.
Absent bringing the events to full consciousness (actually "becoming as a little child" -- the child that was being traumatized; letting oneself become weak in order to feel pain, draining it OUT of the system so that one can be strong in the present) -- absent that, what is left is trying to strengthen defenses (better nutrition can help) and to strengthen them in ways less damaging -- getting into exercise and sports instead of drinking a lot and getting into fistfights; studying [anything non-toxic] instead of consuming junk media; taking up boxing or martial arts instead of taking old feelings out on the wife or kids.
Just shifting to more positive actions in life can be very effective -- for MANY people, but far from all. Each person is different.