Hair's fine. Actually probably paid a lot for it.

That moustache is really poorly grown though. Some people can pull a moustache off. Some people need a full beard or goatee or so on.

He, uh, cannot.

Funnily enough, testosterone helps cause hair loss in men... But enhances facial hair growth, making it have better coverage and thicker, healthier hairs.

What I mean to say is that it's clear that Geraldo is a soyboy.