Yeah, his big deal is that he's from a mixed-race family, and he disagrees with it. It has more to do with cultural problems than racial problems though, and I don't know if he realizes that. I am white and married a Japanese woman myself. I was able to avoid so many problems, but as charming as J-girls can be, nearly none of them have grown up seeing their parents love each other. They all seem incapable of balancing the roles of "loving wife" and "loving mother" and I'm speaking from not just personal experience, but from what I have heard many others tell me. Sure, the divorce rate is much lower than in the USA, but it doesn't mean the marriages are happier. My wife changed after she had our baby. She saw how her parents didn't love each other, and I thought that she would have made a point to learn from their mistakes.
Fuentes is probably coming from an ethnic identity insecurity, but I understand that mixed-race children from black and white mixed parents have it worse. Those whom I have met told me that the racism and exclusion they get are from blacks and tend to feel more comfortable with whites. My own daughter has issues with insecurities on her role in this world, but I think she gets it more living in a small town in Japan than if we had remained in America. Then again, she's actually learning stuff in school, rather than "Suzie and her two mommies and their trip to the communist bookstore" and "men get periods too" crap.
I find the Japanese to be quite racist, but seem to be perhaps least racist against "White People". Very racist against Chinese (totally justified), Korean (seems like "beating up on my little brother") and blacks (blacks do not do well in Japan, in my experience. OK maybe they do OK in Okinawa).
I really like the Japanese, especially those that cleave to the old ways. I had a conversation years ago where an old daimyo could not get over the fact that this gaijiin could quote Hagakure. He couldn't get over it. "No one in Japan reads this book, anymore." But of course all of his people do.
The wabi-sabi sensibility... the seeking of balance and beauty and quietness in the old ways... all of us need a whole lot more of this.
I do think a mixed race White/Japanese girl will always get shit on by some in Japan. But it does seem that folks just get over it. In any case, she grows up to be strong. She can be a merging of von Clausewitz/Machiavelli, and Sun Tzu and Musashi-san. East and West. Shin-ken.
Also, the legacy of the pre-American Japanese culture does affect how affection/love works, it seems to me. Japanese are almost a culture that went from feudalism to Hondas and Walkmans. I don't think a lot of people fully see how much changed, so quickly. It's an odd ramming forward of cultures, especially for the people of Bushido.
Your wife is probably a victim of all of this ramming forward, plus the chaos of WWII and the abject shame of what happened after, etc. I see this with some Euro friends who are from countries that really got hammered in WWII (Italy, France, Germany, etc.).
My favorite example of the over-correction/over-compensation that half-black people can sometimes have is that dumbshit NFL player, Kaepernick. Grew up in what seems like an idyllic "White" family, became successful in his own way, starts dating a BLM/NoI girlfriend and now he thinks he's Malcolm X/Shaft. More Black than Black. Ridiculous Clown Shit. Sad.
I was having a conversation with the president of a plastic model company that makes WWII fighter planes and such at a modeling event and he told me of how many of the Japanese soldiers had gone from wearing wooden geta sandals and having never shot a gun to wearing military boots and carrying rifles. Most of the fighter pilots had never even driven a car before being trained to fly a plane.
I'd say Japan is probably the least racist of all Asian countries. Having 24 years experience with Japan and getting to meet a lot of people with international marriages, Japanese are the most welcoming for their daughters marrying a foreigner. But yeah, one black guy and one Hispainic guy were married to J-gals who were disowned by their own families. Then again, I had a black friend in the city I moved from 6 years ago who was well-loved by his in-laws. He was also instantly popular with all the kids at whatever schools he went to. They'd ignore me and go straight to him.
A friend of mine married into quite a traditional family, and he basically had to super-super-duper convince her Father he was an honorable man, would provide for her, etc. This wasn't not conversation over a beer. This was a full on (polite) interrogation. After he did so, he indeed was accepted.
And yes, the Chinese are super-racist. Koreans as well. SE Asians seem a little more relaxed about it, but I do not have a lot of experience there.
Chinese and Vietnamese are super duper racist towards Japanese. When I still lived in America, I had a friend in San Diego who was engaged to a Vietnamese chick. My wife and I were visiting America and the four of us went out to dinner. We could not break the ice with her at all. Later when they got married, she laid down the law that she would permit him to watch anime, provided it was dubbed in English. He was like, "But the English acting sucks." She did not want that filthy Japanese language heard in her house. Funny because the Vietnamese language sounds like a goat choking on bubblegum. Japanese people don't seem to mind Chinese so much on a personal basis, but I have to say that the culture is completely inferior. They are crass, rude, arrogant, and can be pretty obnoxious. Several years ago, we caught a show on TV showing the problems with Chinese tourists. Men hopping the train cross guards after they go down to dash in front of trains. Women at a food stall helping themselves to dango on a skewer, not liking it, and handing the rest to the seller as if it was just a free sample. Parents just standing there as their child just climbs all over a statue. Etc etc etc.
Taiwanese are different, but it's because they are the smart people who were able to flee China as the US State Department handed the country over to the commies. Then the commies proceeded to line up the cultured, educated people in the streets and shot them in front of everyone.
Yeah, his big deal is that he's from a mixed-race family, and he disagrees with it. It has more to do with cultural problems than racial problems though, and I don't know if he realizes that. I am white and married a Japanese woman myself. I was able to avoid so many problems, but as charming as J-girls can be, nearly none of them have grown up seeing their parents love each other. They all seem incapable of balancing the roles of "loving wife" and "loving mother" and I'm speaking from not just personal experience, but from what I have heard many others tell me. Sure, the divorce rate is much lower than in the USA, but it doesn't mean the marriages are happier. My wife changed after she had our baby. She saw how her parents didn't love each other, and I thought that she would have made a point to learn from their mistakes.
Fuentes is probably coming from an ethnic identity insecurity, but I understand that mixed-race children from black and white mixed parents have it worse. Those whom I have met told me that the racism and exclusion they get are from blacks and tend to feel more comfortable with whites. My own daughter has issues with insecurities on her role in this world, but I think she gets it more living in a small town in Japan than if we had remained in America. Then again, she's actually learning stuff in school, rather than "Suzie and her two mommies and their trip to the communist bookstore" and "men get periods too" crap.
P.S. I will add a fun (Japanese) one. I bet you already know this one.
"The ideal husband is healthy, and far away."
So des, neh.
I find the Japanese to be quite racist, but seem to be perhaps least racist against "White People". Very racist against Chinese (totally justified), Korean (seems like "beating up on my little brother") and blacks (blacks do not do well in Japan, in my experience. OK maybe they do OK in Okinawa).
I really like the Japanese, especially those that cleave to the old ways. I had a conversation years ago where an old daimyo could not get over the fact that this gaijiin could quote Hagakure. He couldn't get over it. "No one in Japan reads this book, anymore." But of course all of his people do.
The wabi-sabi sensibility... the seeking of balance and beauty and quietness in the old ways... all of us need a whole lot more of this.
I do think a mixed race White/Japanese girl will always get shit on by some in Japan. But it does seem that folks just get over it. In any case, she grows up to be strong. She can be a merging of von Clausewitz/Machiavelli, and Sun Tzu and Musashi-san. East and West. Shin-ken.
Also, the legacy of the pre-American Japanese culture does affect how affection/love works, it seems to me. Japanese are almost a culture that went from feudalism to Hondas and Walkmans. I don't think a lot of people fully see how much changed, so quickly. It's an odd ramming forward of cultures, especially for the people of Bushido.
Your wife is probably a victim of all of this ramming forward, plus the chaos of WWII and the abject shame of what happened after, etc. I see this with some Euro friends who are from countries that really got hammered in WWII (Italy, France, Germany, etc.).
My favorite example of the over-correction/over-compensation that half-black people can sometimes have is that dumbshit NFL player, Kaepernick. Grew up in what seems like an idyllic "White" family, became successful in his own way, starts dating a BLM/NoI girlfriend and now he thinks he's Malcolm X/Shaft. More Black than Black. Ridiculous Clown Shit. Sad.
I was having a conversation with the president of a plastic model company that makes WWII fighter planes and such at a modeling event and he told me of how many of the Japanese soldiers had gone from wearing wooden geta sandals and having never shot a gun to wearing military boots and carrying rifles. Most of the fighter pilots had never even driven a car before being trained to fly a plane.
I'd say Japan is probably the least racist of all Asian countries. Having 24 years experience with Japan and getting to meet a lot of people with international marriages, Japanese are the most welcoming for their daughters marrying a foreigner. But yeah, one black guy and one Hispainic guy were married to J-gals who were disowned by their own families. Then again, I had a black friend in the city I moved from 6 years ago who was well-loved by his in-laws. He was also instantly popular with all the kids at whatever schools he went to. They'd ignore me and go straight to him.
Yes I always reserve the right to be wrong. :)
A friend of mine married into quite a traditional family, and he basically had to super-super-duper convince her Father he was an honorable man, would provide for her, etc. This wasn't not conversation over a beer. This was a full on (polite) interrogation. After he did so, he indeed was accepted.
And yes, the Chinese are super-racist. Koreans as well. SE Asians seem a little more relaxed about it, but I do not have a lot of experience there.
Chinese and Vietnamese are super duper racist towards Japanese. When I still lived in America, I had a friend in San Diego who was engaged to a Vietnamese chick. My wife and I were visiting America and the four of us went out to dinner. We could not break the ice with her at all. Later when they got married, she laid down the law that she would permit him to watch anime, provided it was dubbed in English. He was like, "But the English acting sucks." She did not want that filthy Japanese language heard in her house. Funny because the Vietnamese language sounds like a goat choking on bubblegum. Japanese people don't seem to mind Chinese so much on a personal basis, but I have to say that the culture is completely inferior. They are crass, rude, arrogant, and can be pretty obnoxious. Several years ago, we caught a show on TV showing the problems with Chinese tourists. Men hopping the train cross guards after they go down to dash in front of trains. Women at a food stall helping themselves to dango on a skewer, not liking it, and handing the rest to the seller as if it was just a free sample. Parents just standing there as their child just climbs all over a statue. Etc etc etc.
Taiwanese are different, but it's because they are the smart people who were able to flee China as the US State Department handed the country over to the commies. Then the commies proceeded to line up the cultured, educated people in the streets and shot them in front of everyone.