When I was growing up I got spanked by my parents and whenever it happened I almost always did something to deserve it and I knew it. My cousins got the same, and my siblings.
My grandma is Indian from Trinidad and Tobago, she had the scarriest punishment and you knew to listen to grandma and behave:
- normally she'd give you a light knock on the crown of the head, it was like the worse ever because nothing is injured and she hardly touched you and it hurt so bad
- "The heat for the seat" was a large wooden decorative spoon the size of a plate, she broke it on my cousin when he wouldn't stop beating me up
We laugh about it now, he knew he deserved it and it was funny in hindsight that it broke after correcting 2 generations of familly members.
Growing up I could always tell the kids that were never spanked from the ones that were. The kids who were never spanked all had these traits:
- complete lack of fear of authority
- complete disrespect for adult
- bullying of others, including crybullying
- lack of respect for the law
- propensity to cheat
- no respect for other people property
- a willigness to commit petty theft for fun
I think that the modern ideals are wrong. I believe in the old wisdom of our forefathers.
Grandma was right to hit us.
Proverbs 22:18
"Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him."
So I basically trusted in Biblical discipline... "Spare the rod, spoil the child".
I had 5 children in the 80's and they knew the parameters of what was expected of them. I home schooled and we would all go grocery shopping, out to eat or wherever we needed to go and they were respectful and well behaved. We spent a great deal of time in church also and I never hesitated to go anywhere with them. People were always glad to have my children over.
I used a wooden spoon as my rod of discipline and while I think it was beneficial...none of my children spank their kids. My only regret is that I probably spanked in anger at times and that is wrong. So yes, I believe in corporal punishment but you have to spend time establishing the rules and then spend the time to explain what they did wrong and what the punishment would be and then how to correct the behavior. I think I could not have survived having 5 children if they behaved like most kids I see today...
I will add that as they got older most chose the path of rebellion against God and their parents many times...but you always hope you have given them a good foundation.
Amen.