Welcome to General Chat - GAW Community Area
This General Chat area started off as a place for people to talk about things that are off topic, however it has quickly evolved into a community and has become an integral part of the GAW experience for many of us.
Based on its evolving needs and plenty of user feedback, we are trying to bring some order and institute some rules. Please make sure you read these rules and participate in the spirit of this community.
Rules for General Chat
-
Be respectful to each other. This is of utmost importance, and comments may be removed if deemed not respectful.
-
Avoid long drawn out arguments. This should be a place to relax, not to waste your time needlessly.
-
Personal anecdotes, puzzles, cute pics/clips - everything welcome
-
Please do not spam at the top level. If you have a lot to post each day, try and post them all together in one top level comment
-
Try keep things light. If you are bringing in deep stuff, try not to go overboard.
-
Things that are clearly on-topic for this board should be posted as a separate post and not here (except if you are new and still getting the feel of this place)
-
If you find people violating these rules, deport them rather than start a argument here.
-
Feel free to give feedback as these rules are expected to keep evoloving
In short, imagine this thread to be a local community hall where we all gather and chat daily. Please be respectful to others in the same way
So my wife and I have a constant dilemma relating to conversations with others
When someone talks to my wife complaining or venting about something, she will listen to completely to what they have to say and when they finish, she will try to relate it to her own past experiences to show she understands and sympathizes, and can possibly offer advice based on past experiences
She often feels awful about this and feels wrong for it. I tell her that it is ok and what is she supposed to do? Listen and simply nod and say ok? Move on to something else entirely? If someone were telling me how awful work is or a problem at home, I could not just listen then ask them how the Chicago Cubs are doing
Unfortunately, aggregate articles and mainstream blogs tell her she is wrong, that you should never try to relate or offer your views, that you should always just listen
It is mind boggling to me. How are conversations supposed to flow? I would be pretty damn upset mysel If I vented about something to someone, and all they gave me were nods, it's oks, or moved on to another unrelated topic
How do you frens and anons feel? "JUST LISTEN" I think might work for a shrink..but even they would then offer advice or help after listening, based on their own experiences, opinions, and their studies
Here is an advice - dont take advice from magazines and blogs
I dont think its a matter of taking advice from those things, neccessarily. I get these kind of headlines in aggragate articles, and it makes me think, "wow, so the entire world is saying i talk to/empathize with people wrong". I'm not necassarily actually consuming the articles, but it could lead me to think about the subject matter anyway.