He's nearly 21 and has never had a job. He wakes up every morning eager to do something but never follows through on any plans he makes. One minute he was all amped up about residential pest mitigation and the next he wants to be an inspector for local rivers and help clean up debris... I am honestly frustrated, he won't cook or clean let alone help with our financial struggles.
I really love him with every inch of my heart and soul but I don't know how to get him to contribute more or be more independent. I really don't want to kick him out but I don't think it's fair for him to contribute nothing to our relationship.
I'd really appreciate any thoughts or advice from my frens.
Edit: thank you all for your advice about my dog, I'll see if I can get him to cook but there's no way I'm letting him join the military. He kept that squirrel and neighbors cat out of the yard so I think I'll take him down to the river to fetch sticks.
Edit 2: I have found my kid employment, he is now wrangling small unicorns for work.
I just kicked my 20 year old out. He grew up with me and his mom. She took off for DC for a 1 year rotation (lol....another dude she didn't think I knew about) when he was 14 and in juvi on a 30 day stint. He did 170 days over 7 months. After I divorced his mom I worked on wrangling him back in because it was obvious we went wrong somewhere, likely the constant fighting. He got himself out of the system just before he turned 18 finally. But he was doing nothing but.....nothing towards getting his life better. No GED, no Diploma. I fixed his hand me down car up and said "good luck". He lived out of his car for 3 months, working door dash and Jimmy John's. I kept a close eye on him. Always knew what parking lot he was sleeping in that night. I ended up going on travel to SAN DIEGO for 8 months. Told him he could go and it's his last chance with me helping. He got a job and got his GED while there. Came back home, he's out on his own figuring his own way out at 20. I don't know where he is, don't want to. I call him every other day or so and tell him I love him, ask if he's good, which he says he is. He wants to prove everyone wrong. He thinks everyone thinks he's a failure. He's a phenomenal musician, well known in my area. I know he'll be ok. It's hard. But it will be ok.