Guys, I would be honored if you would nominate me to be the official Congressional Correspondent for GAW. 👍😀

I have no bans or punishments on my record, and what I believe is a varied and stellar post history, with everything from news clips to write-ups that have been stickied - and ALWAYS high energy too! 😬😆

I have reliable transportation and am good with social media, while still being, errm, "mature" enough to appeal to our core MAGA audience. I can start work ASAP and have open availability! Salary expectations are negotiable, and any level of press credential can work for me, even the back of the room - just had my hearing and vision checks and I'm still tippy top! 🤣🤯

Hope you will consider me as a strong candidate pedes! Godspeed! 🤣😅🥴