Gotta get this off my chest....
So my dad died this thanksgiving. Respiratory failure. He was a hard line Republican, big trump fan, and retired from the usaf, but decided that he should stay in his mountain home with copd and not go to lower altitudes. It's kind of a miracle he lasted this long, but I wanted him to see so much more from me. That said, it was quick and probably painless, according to the coroner at least.
I'll be in CO for a few months at least sorting out his affairs. Then... Well, we will see.
2025 has been a bit of a shit year for me tbh personally. My mom threatened suicide at least once, my last pet died, my wife's dad had multiple heart attacks and though alive is still not 100% right, my own health went in a tailspin and my wife's seems to be doing a bit shit too, and I haven't been able to find work for the entire year. Those are just the highlights, as it feels like shit keeps hitting the fan for me. Now this.
Feels like every 4 years some new fresh form of hell gets unlocked. 4 years ago my first wife died suddenly in every meaning of that term. Four years before that, my house went up in flames. Sure financially it worked out for me each time, and will likely do so again with this, but I'm so tired of tragedy and misery knocking on my door over and over again.
Thing is, I can't stop, even though what I want to do is just curl up and fall apart. Gotta stay strong, otherwise everything else will crumble around me. But I just wanted to give him a grandkid before he went. I wanted him to be able to read the book series I've been writing.
Sorry. I know people out there and here probably have it worse than me. I'm just down, and rambling a bit. Tbh I really hope some good shit happens next year, cuz I can't wait for this year to end already.
It sounds like you have a relationship with our Lord Jesus. And with that all I can say is just cling even harder towards Him. Spend a good amount of time, a season, just listening to His word and thanking Him for all He has done. I sometimes think these things happen to get us to change course in our present situation. God loves us so much, and He’ll bring discourse to guide us. And I thank Him for that. I’m sorry for your dads passing. But if he had Jesus, you already know. Absent from the body is presence with the Lord. He’s in great hands. But we still feel the loss. We continue the mission. It’s worth it. Maybe pull back from these worldly issues for awhile. Like these forums. Maybe you already have. Focus on the Lord. Personally I’ve been through a “season” recently, and thankfully survived it. It’s been 10 days since my hospitalization and the worse sickness I’ve ever had in my life. The pain, terrible. Went in for weeks and weeks. Couldn’t eat, couldn’t drink. I’m a much less man physically right now I’ll tell ya, lol. And through it all, I constantly thanked the Lord. Thanked Him for the pain. There was a purpose to that affliction, I know it. And so I continued to thank Him for all He’s done for me these past few years. Church family. My own family. Every little thing, maybe nothing to the next person, but for me is everything. I just unplug out if this world. It’s not for us. We are pilgrims in a foreign land. I hope the Lord starts to bring the sunshine in you and your families lives. Let us see what’s truly important. And leave the worlds problems behind. Absolutely praying for you friend. Thank you for posting this. With love brother. ❤️