Good morning. I will retract one point that I hadn't considered: I should have said that when all the offenses are committed in public, I have conceded that there is not that much of a problem with carrying on the reconciliation in public also, if it is not disruptive to public order. The proceeding now is not disruptive to public order. Yet you are not being too responsive to our questions.
Matt. 18 is about gaining brothers: Do you desire to gain us back as brothers, or not?
Matt. 18 is about resolving offenses: Do you desire to resolve your offenses, or retain them without obeying Jesus about them?
Swampy, - may I ask why you Intentionally... phrase your questions (whether to Andy, or any other person for that matter) which BIND the other party, such that they are Not allowed to express their Perceptions... but are stuck with only your own. -
Asking because that MO is Intentionally Manipulative, you know.
In this case it's to put gentle pressure on someone who has expressed offense during the period we had difficulty communicating the offense. It prevents him from dropping the subject or diverting. He asked us to relinquish the forum in Jesus's name, and I take that seriously and will not permit him to leave it uncontextualized. It's still his job to provide the context.
Now that he has given a responsible, dialogue-advancing reply we can probably proceed more naturally.
In general, the sales tactic of the "presumptive close" is a bargaining method of laying out different options that are all acceptable to the proposer and directing dialogue toward the proposition that the choice has been made nonverbally already. Sometimes it's very effective, sometimes it's manipulative, and it can even sink to the level of gaslighting.
Any time you think I'm manipulating, please advise! (I hope I'm not "manipulating" to give you the "options" of (1) if you are offended please take responsibility to tell me and (2) if you don't tell me I'll assume you're not offended. But see, the unstated option is that (3) you exert the right to retain offense and not have to tell me. By my framing I'm gently pushing you away from that risk. So there is a responsible use of persuasion.)
Nowadays, accusing someone else of gaslighting might itself be gaslighting. The answer is always sunshine, transparency, and justice.
Yep, and who is the one cloaking everything in darkness?
Good morning. I will retract one point that I hadn't considered: I should have said that when all the offenses are committed in public, I have conceded that there is not that much of a problem with carrying on the reconciliation in public also, if it is not disruptive to public order. The proceeding now is not disruptive to public order. Yet you are not being too responsive to our questions.
Matt. 18 is about gaining brothers: Do you desire to gain us back as brothers, or not?
Matt. 18 is about resolving offenses: Do you desire to resolve your offenses, or retain them without obeying Jesus about them?
Swampy, - may I ask why you Intentionally... phrase your questions (whether to Andy, or any other person for that matter) which BIND the other party, such that they are Not allowed to express their Perceptions... but are stuck with only your own. -
Asking because that MO is Intentionally Manipulative, you know.
In this case it's to put gentle pressure on someone who has expressed offense during the period we had difficulty communicating the offense. It prevents him from dropping the subject or diverting. He asked us to relinquish the forum in Jesus's name, and I take that seriously and will not permit him to leave it uncontextualized. It's still his job to provide the context.
Now that he has given a responsible, dialogue-advancing reply we can probably proceed more naturally.
In general, the sales tactic of the "presumptive close" is a bargaining method of laying out different options that are all acceptable to the proposer and directing dialogue toward the proposition that the choice has been made nonverbally already. Sometimes it's very effective, sometimes it's manipulative, and it can even sink to the level of gaslighting.
Any time you think I'm manipulating, please advise! (I hope I'm not "manipulating" to give you the "options" of (1) if you are offended please take responsibility to tell me and (2) if you don't tell me I'll assume you're not offended. But see, the unstated option is that (3) you exert the right to retain offense and not have to tell me. By my framing I'm gently pushing you away from that risk. So there is a responsible use of persuasion.)