When I look around me NPCs are doing better than me. Even though I believe I was never fully NPC in the past.
You would think being aware about what’s going on in the world, you would have a sense of freedom.
I also got hit really hard by the covid fiasco mentally. Just by seeing all those NPC around me championing all the restrictions, made me feel very lonely for a while. Because my mind was and is not the same as theirs. If I would speak out what’s in my mind I probably wouldn’t have any friends surrounding me anymore.
I’m not being myself, I’m being fake, so that the NPCs would accept me. The fake me is the person that they like about me and want hang around with.
I totally lost all joy in life, my addictions became heavier over the last two years, the last months I’m doing better to quit them.
But being sober all the time brings back all those bad feelings. I’m not even able to focus on loving someone. My friends think I’m low energy. But the addictions kept me that way.
And the question “What am I even doing here on this planet” start roaming in my head again.
When I have good times, I get upset that some others don’t. Do I even have the right to pray to God for more and more, while others are begging for food and are sleeping on the streets.
Does God even care about me? If he does, than does he cares about the others as well?
Life just seems not fair for the majority people on earth.
Those feelings hold me back to advance my own life. While dreaming about all those cool stuff you can do on this earth.
Just being aware of so many things made me very destructive towards myself.
Is there someone who can relate? Were you able to get your lust for life back?
I'm right there with you. I hate the things I used to love because I know they are a distraction. I even have a hard time focusing on work. It's like my life is on pause.
Don't kill yourself. You sound depressed. Go get some fresh air. Walk around your neighborhood, if it's safe.
Let me know if you want to chat one on one. It's rough out there. But like never before I think things are about to change. We will be the normies and the normies will be shitting themselves.
They will ask you how you knew. Fuck'em. Find people that are awake. Change your circle. It's been great!
"How did you know?!?" -Normies
"How did you not?" -Me
The problem we face is the massive psyop conducted against all things Trump.
IF the plan ever pans out - how do we ever get our victory lap?
The plan cannot play out as Trump being responsible OR the normies will refuse to accept it. Trump has to be the defeated loser who is also complicit or else normies wont be able to cope. IF Trump has any exposure to being involved normies will fight him at all costs.
It sucks.
The omnibus and Ukraine are simply a way to speed up the death of the Dollar/swift banking system/petro dollar.
This has always been about who controls the money after the dollar implodes and burns the world financial system down with it.
We want the good guys to win (obviously), because if not, it’s Revelation time and mark of the beast system is here soon after.
Don’t worry too much about the crazy spending. We are so far past the point of no return that another few hundred billion for Ukraine won’t matter.
Fresh air is definitely a pain killer! Don’t worry I’ll keep on living. Thanks