Well, I guess this must be a cultural difference or something. I never understood the concept that fearing your parents or a god is something good, and to me this certainly has nothing to do with ones morals.
Perhaps the word "fear" has a different meaning in English than in my language, because living in fear of your god or parents, sounds awfully similar to living in fear under a dictatorship. Perhaps "fear" is closer to "respect" in your language/culture? It is not in mine, and I do not consider it healthy to live under constant fear.
Perhaps "fateful awe" might come close. Imagine having a really big but friendly elephant in the home. Any stray move could crush you. It concentrates the attention. You don't sass back and you are always mindful of walking in its ways.
But there is something to what NanaQ45 has to say. My parents lived the principle that they were Forces of Nature, not to be quibbled with. No argument was relevant to any outcome. That instills obedience, which is a survival trait. They loved us dearly, showed it, and we believed it completely, and thus loved them well in return. They were right. It is more important in parenting to be respected, than loved. The love will come, but without a foundation of respect, it will be fickle.
They're 38 and 30. Jeez. If kids don't fear their parents, they'll never fear God and their.morals will be questionable, at best.
Well, I guess this must be a cultural difference or something. I never understood the concept that fearing your parents or a god is something good, and to me this certainly has nothing to do with ones morals.
Perhaps the word "fear" has a different meaning in English than in my language, because living in fear of your god or parents, sounds awfully similar to living in fear under a dictatorship. Perhaps "fear" is closer to "respect" in your language/culture? It is not in mine, and I do not consider it healthy to live under constant fear.
Respectful acquiesce
Perhaps "fateful awe" might come close. Imagine having a really big but friendly elephant in the home. Any stray move could crush you. It concentrates the attention. You don't sass back and you are always mindful of walking in its ways.
But there is something to what NanaQ45 has to say. My parents lived the principle that they were Forces of Nature, not to be quibbled with. No argument was relevant to any outcome. That instills obedience, which is a survival trait. They loved us dearly, showed it, and we believed it completely, and thus loved them well in return. They were right. It is more important in parenting to be respected, than loved. The love will come, but without a foundation of respect, it will be fickle.