Sure sucks in a lot of ways, still better than the alternative, at least sometimes....
TBF, plenty of older fellow men warned me what to expect when I was younger, but I still wasn't really prepared. Thought I had another 10 years to get ready...
Sad thing is I don't look my age and am in better shape than in my 40s - my libido is stronger than ever. Luckily I work from home and no longer have the distractions of lady coworkers. I'd like to think I'd be strong enough to stay faithful, but there were days in that last 18 months spell I was glad I didn't have to find out for sure. But the reality is that, at best, I got a brief respite and I get to spend the next 30 years in involuntary celibacy.
I don't know why women either don't know or don't care how important sex is to a husband's well-being and performance - at work, in interpersonal relationships, and in success in just about all aspects of life. For better or worse, it drives a lot of what we do, how we act, and whether we succeed. I'm convinced married women could collectively kill at least half the porn industry if they just made love with their husbands more often. Probably would also get more action on those honey-do items too if they didn't take away the poor guy's main motivation.
It's not a question of a trade, it's a question of motivation.
There's a reason men are driven to achieve, to do the hard things women don't want to do - whether it's wars, or fighting nature, or doing mindless chores, and the root of it is sex or the promise/possibility of sex. It doesn't even have to be a realistic possibility. We are driven to procreate at the most basic level. Heck, our race would have died off long ago if it was left solely to women.
"I find this mentality incredibly immature and a huge turn off."
Guess what men think about women's emotion-driven actions/inactions? It's not wrong, it's what makes us complementary as genders. The difference is women's needs are drilled into men's heads their entire lives, while women appear to be completely oblivious to those of men.
Men who don't support their women are pariahed by society, while women treat leaving their men unfulfilled as a running joke.
Let me put this a different way. You've probably had times in your life when you were really horny - especially if you've been pregnant.
This is the state men are in every waking hour from about 13 until the day they die. Sure, we learn to deal with it better with age, and yes, eventually our bodies aren't going to be able to cooperate, but the overwhelming drive is there and it's there all the time.
Likewise men experience times when they are overwhelmed with emotion or conflicting emotions to the point it clouds their judgement, or need positive validation from their partner (or others). But, in my experience, it happens about as often as women are really horny - it isn't the subtext of our lives the way it is with women.
These respective drivers have huge implications on what we do or don't do, how we feel about ourselves, and how we relate to our spouses/partners and those around us. They often get in the way of more cerebral or practical concerns for better or worse. It's just the way we're wired and yes, with time, both sexes can learn to manage them better.
I'll never truly know what being a woman is like, but I can extrapolate from those times I've been on emotional roller-coasters and try to empathize with and support my wife when she needs it without judging her or invalidating her even if I think she's being ridiculous. But the difference here is women can and do get emotional support from others besides their husband, and sometimes that's actually better for them. And a lot of time, despite their best intentions, men just don't really understand what their wife is going through because we can't really know.
I'm just saying maybe women should try to maybe do the same for men, especially in a marriage where men essentially, contractually, and morally have no other options than their wife to satisfy their needs.
Upvote for knowing how it feels to be in late 50s.
Sure sucks in a lot of ways, still better than the alternative, at least sometimes....
TBF, plenty of older fellow men warned me what to expect when I was younger, but I still wasn't really prepared. Thought I had another 10 years to get ready...
Sad thing is I don't look my age and am in better shape than in my 40s - my libido is stronger than ever. Luckily I work from home and no longer have the distractions of lady coworkers. I'd like to think I'd be strong enough to stay faithful, but there were days in that last 18 months spell I was glad I didn't have to find out for sure. But the reality is that, at best, I got a brief respite and I get to spend the next 30 years in involuntary celibacy.
I don't know why women either don't know or don't care how important sex is to a husband's well-being and performance - at work, in interpersonal relationships, and in success in just about all aspects of life. For better or worse, it drives a lot of what we do, how we act, and whether we succeed. I'm convinced married women could collectively kill at least half the porn industry if they just made love with their husbands more often. Probably would also get more action on those honey-do items too if they didn't take away the poor guy's main motivation.
Ew, really?
Have sex with me and I'll do more chores?
I could never be married to someone like this. I find this mentality incredibly immature and a huge turn off.
It's not a question of a trade, it's a question of motivation.
There's a reason men are driven to achieve, to do the hard things women don't want to do - whether it's wars, or fighting nature, or doing mindless chores, and the root of it is sex or the promise/possibility of sex. It doesn't even have to be a realistic possibility. We are driven to procreate at the most basic level. Heck, our race would have died off long ago if it was left solely to women.
"I find this mentality incredibly immature and a huge turn off."
Guess what men think about women's emotion-driven actions/inactions? It's not wrong, it's what makes us complementary as genders. The difference is women's needs are drilled into men's heads their entire lives, while women appear to be completely oblivious to those of men.
Men who don't support their women are pariahed by society, while women treat leaving their men unfulfilled as a running joke.
Let me put this a different way. You've probably had times in your life when you were really horny - especially if you've been pregnant.
This is the state men are in every waking hour from about 13 until the day they die. Sure, we learn to deal with it better with age, and yes, eventually our bodies aren't going to be able to cooperate, but the overwhelming drive is there and it's there all the time.
Likewise men experience times when they are overwhelmed with emotion or conflicting emotions to the point it clouds their judgement, or need positive validation from their partner (or others). But, in my experience, it happens about as often as women are really horny - it isn't the subtext of our lives the way it is with women.
These respective drivers have huge implications on what we do or don't do, how we feel about ourselves, and how we relate to our spouses/partners and those around us. They often get in the way of more cerebral or practical concerns for better or worse. It's just the way we're wired and yes, with time, both sexes can learn to manage them better.
I'll never truly know what being a woman is like, but I can extrapolate from those times I've been on emotional roller-coasters and try to empathize with and support my wife when she needs it without judging her or invalidating her even if I think she's being ridiculous. But the difference here is women can and do get emotional support from others besides their husband, and sometimes that's actually better for them. And a lot of time, despite their best intentions, men just don't really understand what their wife is going through because we can't really know.
I'm just saying maybe women should try to maybe do the same for men, especially in a marriage where men essentially, contractually, and morally have no other options than their wife to satisfy their needs.