I believe GOD made me write this because I need as many prayers as I can get.
I have three beautiful sons.
And as any parent knows, sometimes one of your children gets off the beaten track and you find yourself dealing with an issue you are unprepared to handle.
My youngest son has had an issue with alcoholism for years. Several stays at Hazelton, three marriages, and unsuccessful AA meetings.
My other two sons decided it best to not tell me when he fell off the wagon - to shield me from the pain.
Last year he married a wonderful gal who he told me yesterday, is more supportive about helping him with his addiction than anyone else in his life.
Last night he called to tell me that he was once again going to Hazelton. I had no idea he had fallen off the wagon again. I told him I loved him and would pray for him and asked him if he had a bible. He said he did and I told him he MUST get right with GOD.
I told him without GOD he would not make a lasting recovery and he agreed. He sounded like he had finally decided this was the time to get clean because of the support of his wife.
Tonight middle son called to tell me that during the intake physical exam they discovered he had atrial fibrillation and they took him by ambulance to a hospital.
He works for Minnesota DMV and he had to get the vaccination when they first came out but refused the booster. Whether this has anything to do with the heart issue, only GOD knows for sure.
I sit here tonight knowing that my youngest son, whom I remember as a beautiful happy child may die and I cannot be with him.
If it is GOD's will that he be taken to Heaven, so be it. But it does not alleviate the pain in my heart.
So I guess I not only need prayers for Brian, but I need prayers for his Mom.
The story of Job is often referenced in a couple of ways. The first being about suffering and how God let Job suffer and such and so if life is hard it could be worse, you could be Job. I often reject that take altogether and more and more people seem to be doing the same.
The second take is that when Job finally asked God why, God responds with something about not being there at the dawn of creation and a bunch of perspective talk. Most people assume this to mean a reminder that we are small and are never to question God. I also reject this take altogether, but unfortunately too many others don't yet.
For me the story of Job is about honesty and truthfulness. Truthfulness to God and self. When Job, after losing everything finally comes before God, when he finally is truthful with his heart and the situation, God gives an answer and Job finds peace... God then restores Job completely, something that's counter to to the idea in the second part I mentioned. If it was about never questioning God then why did God restore him? Why would God reward Job with a second, bountiful life instead of letting him wallow: "You dare question me!?! I will leave you as poor as you are now. Enjoy the last years of your existence in pain and suffering-" no He doesn't do that, instead He gives it all back. The key takeaway being that Job didn't get over the suffering until AFTER he was honest with God and himself.
My point is, I have been through some shit and I didn't get through it by huddling in a corner in the fetal position saying "lalalala God is good!!!! lalalala God is good Thy Will be done-" no... I got through it by being honest with Him and with me. When I was angry, I told Him I am angry. When I wanted the suffering to end I screamed out loud that I was over it. When I felt something in my life was wrong, I told Him "it's wrong". Every time I have been in a rough situation, I find clarity in being truthful so while I will honor your request, I would ask that you consider my words and that if you are mad, tell Him. Be honest with your feelings. Don't keep up some facade like you have something to prove, because you don't. Your relationship is between you and He. And with that I leave you with well wishes and support.
That is a very thoughtful reply, I believe you're right in that. When I go through my troubling time I also try to pray honestly.
Bringing my problems before God and asking him to help, it helps get to the heart of the issue. Nothing wrong with people affirming to themselves that God is good, as he is.
It's always in my thoughts but when I'm in pain ( spiritual, mental or physical) I bring the issues to God.
It helps strengthen your walk with God.
Yes. You are spot on about Job.
Further context is the timeline of Job in that the story took place before Moses. Also of interest to some BibleAnons is the fact Lucifer was allowed audience with God in Heaven.
These points are of interest in the story for a big reason - especially RE: Addiction & Love:
Now why would God allow that? It’s the nature of our Hearts & Souls.
@OP You %100 were sent here.
This may not make sense now - I am excited for you.
You are @ Prime Time to go & seriously be amongst your family.
Take Audience:
Say this knowing they will continue to be siblings and weigh and make their own decisions. Remember when you are gone they will continue this model. Set the example.
Secrets Make Sick
I say this as I am in recovery Myself from literally Complex PTSD & Addiction.
The greatest tool in their chest of Spiritual Warfare is isolation.
I got so wore down I ended up with the PTSD. When PTSD gets more complex and has many angles to it - turns into Complex PTSD. I turned to self medicating. Then shit got worse - I got more isolated. I lost the ground. My heart was broken / shattered. My soul was sick. You name it. A life of seeing death en masse and repressing it, current PTSD additions, all stacked up. Found myself literally in a place where I logically was fully aware of what I was doing but my soul and heart were so sick the only way I could feel joy at all was Drugs.
I didn’t go to a clinic. I didn’t do a Recovery Center. Why?
God was my Recovery Center.
This coming from someone who was basically agnostic: I felt that God was something bigger than me and past my understanding. I didn’t debate he existed. I just didn’t know him.
Those places work for a lot of people. I knew they wouldn’t work for me. This had to be done the way He wanted it. I went to AA meetings and I spoke and people cried. They heard me - then came to me and said “God brought you here.”
To be honest - it wasn’t me talking. Words came into my mind that I feel he put there.
@OP Like I said - I am excited for you. Life is hard & these times are important. Play them & do not play them without God’s Armor. Bout to call someone? Pray. Can’t think of a prayer? Say the Lords Prayer.
Grace.
Know you absolutely were brought here because there are those of us here that have applied our Autism against these Spiritual Attacks ( Addiction being one of them ).
If you hear a negative voice in your head trying to make you sad, negative - otherwise shake you - %99 chance it’s a Spiritual Attack. Focus on being there - feeling later.
If you need ANYTHING - DM me. Come here. Don’t be alone. Need prayers? Tell us. The more asks the better.
Beyond all Mountain Peaks is Peace.