After giving it some thought, the only thing I can think of that might help in the short term is asking her to go to couples therapy.
Not necessarily to repair the relationship, but to at least come back to a place less combatative, at least for the sake of your child. It would also possibly make her feel emotionally safe enough to explain just why this has all happened. Women aren't exactly the most consistent creatures in the world.
At this point I'm assuming she isn't a church-goer herself? If she is, try appealing to that side of her nature to at least meet you half-way.
Bottom line is that she is taking advantage of you by not moving out after dropping such a bombshell into the relationship, and she needs to held to account for that. However, it doesn't sound likely that she is prepared to hear that from you, so a neutral third party might help there.
Whatever happens, I honour you for your courage to fight for your daughters' well-being under what sounds like really difficult circumstances. If all else fails, you could try washing her clothes in itching powder :p
Thank you man. I've asked her this and she's refused. She claims it costs too much and that she doesn't need therapy and that, if I want, I can go to therapy on my own. I even mentioned it's covered on our insurance and that cost has no relevance. (they're just excuses - she just doesn't want to make things work).
I agree. I told her probably a week ago the exact phrase: "You're the one that wants a divorce and ultimately you're the one that brought chaos to this family - so you're the one that needs to be moving out." if I bring up God, she literally says "Don't quote scripture to me!!!" it's bizarre.
It really is odd. It leaves me wondering if there was an external factor involved, perhaps an old school-friend died (first boyfriend kind of thing) something she doesn't even want to admit to herself?
Either way, it sounds like you're doing everything you can, I can see why you'd be so frustrated.
Oh dude, that's a mountain of heartache.
After giving it some thought, the only thing I can think of that might help in the short term is asking her to go to couples therapy.
Not necessarily to repair the relationship, but to at least come back to a place less combatative, at least for the sake of your child. It would also possibly make her feel emotionally safe enough to explain just why this has all happened. Women aren't exactly the most consistent creatures in the world.
At this point I'm assuming she isn't a church-goer herself? If she is, try appealing to that side of her nature to at least meet you half-way.
Bottom line is that she is taking advantage of you by not moving out after dropping such a bombshell into the relationship, and she needs to held to account for that. However, it doesn't sound likely that she is prepared to hear that from you, so a neutral third party might help there.
Whatever happens, I honour you for your courage to fight for your daughters' well-being under what sounds like really difficult circumstances. If all else fails, you could try washing her clothes in itching powder :p
Thank you man. I've asked her this and she's refused. She claims it costs too much and that she doesn't need therapy and that, if I want, I can go to therapy on my own. I even mentioned it's covered on our insurance and that cost has no relevance. (they're just excuses - she just doesn't want to make things work).
I agree. I told her probably a week ago the exact phrase: "You're the one that wants a divorce and ultimately you're the one that brought chaos to this family - so you're the one that needs to be moving out." if I bring up God, she literally says "Don't quote scripture to me!!!" it's bizarre.
It really is odd. It leaves me wondering if there was an external factor involved, perhaps an old school-friend died (first boyfriend kind of thing) something she doesn't even want to admit to herself?
Either way, it sounds like you're doing everything you can, I can see why you'd be so frustrated.