I have been awake for 10 years now but it feels like my mental health from it is at it's worst right now. Like the title says I am having a hard time interacting with a lot of people in my day to day life especially being in a deep blue state (WA). Between the covid crap and knowing the truth about pedophilia I live in a completely different reality and world then the average person.
I don't wear my mask at big box stores most of the time. I do with my mom because she doesn't want to be harassed so I respect that. If it's just my Dad and I we go maskless together.
My aunt came to visit me with her new puppy the other day and was wearing two fucking masks. My aunt is a typical boomer normie. Since I wouldn't wear a mask she kept 6 feet away from me the entire time. She was telling me about this new movie with Tom Hanks in it and the entire time I was just thinking "Tom Hanks is a pedophile". Later she was talking about how she can't wait for my brother and I to get the vaccine, with all my will power I stopped myself from laughing.
Most women in my generation especially in the Seattle area are brain dead. A couple of months ago I was on a date with a woman who is a latina and she was saying how disappointed she was that so many latino's voted for Trump. I asked if she thought they were "racist" cause she claimed that she thinks Trump voters are racist. She says yes because they are white washed. I called the waiter over, paid my tab, told her I don't date racist pieces of shit like her and left.
Dating in general as a Trump voter in the Seattle area is hard. Every girl I have tried to date ends up being a NPC libtard. Then when they find out I am a Trump voter it's like they are disgusted with themselves for fucking a Trump voter. Yet we're the only ones they fuck anyways.
My coworkers are all brain dead too. I am in the beer industry which is really liberal for some reason. I work at a big brewery in the state so being outnumbered 20 to 1 I just don't talk about anything political and have to "act" normal. I listen to them talk shit about Trump all the time. I 100% believe that if I came out as a Trump voter they would find some BS reason to fire me.
I used to be a huge football fan. Haven't watched a game this year. If it weren't for the fact my coworkers talk about it I wouldn't even know that the Chiefs and Buccaneers were in the Super Bowl.
My friend group has shrunk to only the 3 friends that voted for Trump. Our high school friend group has been torn apart over the political scene. I also don't talk to half of my family anymore cause I can't deal with their woke bullshit.
I don't go on social media at all really anymore. I am tired of the media gaslighting and watching the sheep's stupid social media posts.
My tolerance for normies and NPC's is at a zero. I actually hate them more then the Cabal. Without their stupidity, narcissism and false sense of moral superiority the world wouldn't have to deal with the Cabal. I wish the Q team would just rip the band aid off. I don't care if normies and NPC's die from shock from the truth. They enabled this shit so fuck them. I understand everything is at stake here but god damn this burden is hard.
My drinking and pot smoking has gone up a lot with these fucking covid lockdowns and waiting for the plan to unfold. I have held the line for so long and am the most hardcore Trump supporter I know. Speaking of Covid lockdowns Jay Inslee let only the 3 largest counties in the state (all blue) open up. Purely political. He hates Red Eastern Washington and I doubt he'll let them open up anytime soon. I haven't gone to the gym or jiu jitsu/boxing in a year now and I miss it so much.
I am just fed up frens. Just fed up. I question my sanity often. Like I was talking to my brother on the phone and was asking him how the fuck do we see this for what it is and the normies/NPC's are complete sheep. How do we on this site see the truth and others can't? To me it seems to fucking obvious once you put some of the pieces together.
Thanks for reading this post. I needed to rant a bit sorry if I came off like a whiny bitch.
I'll continue to hold the line cause until we win I am not comfortable.
I don't relate to the majority of people I talk to. I only relate to my 3 best friends, my brother, my parents and their neighbors who are redpilled.
I need to turn to God. I am struggling to start though. I need to go sober for awhile and get myself back together. I believe God chose us for a reason.
Your confession of needing to turn to God is the best start you could ever want & music to His ears. The biggest fallacy told today is you need to be perfect or cleaned up before turning to God. However, It is exactly the opposite of what is true, because God will accept you just the way you are now and work through the problems as you grow in your relationship with him.. anything you try to do in your own strength may last a little while, but in the end, the cycle will continue.... trust me , I was no stranger to many addictions, and none of them went away overnight.. but God loved me though all of them and helped me get past them... leave the legalism and religion in the garbage can and talk to him like he's your best friend (because he is) in your everyday language (that's the speech he listens to).. my greatest breakthroughs with God came when I was at my lowest points in life... I will be praying for you, PEACE
Beautiful and truthful words Podingo7. May we all be redpilled with our Savior Jesus Christ.
We're in this world but not of it. Base desires, while I personally think are okay to dabble in since we're here, are not the way.
Look at an inverted Pentagram. Upside down star, right? You can fit the head of Baphomet in that shape. He's horny. Yeah, that kind of horny. He literally has horns up in the air. This shows you that his priority is base desires.
The pentagram is inverted, so if it's a regular one, it's not inverted, just a regular star. This star doesn't fit a goat head. It fits a human body. Two legs on the ground, forming a strong base. Head up at the top, holding spirituality high, base (as in base desires) on the ground.
That doesn't mean the spiritual man or woman doesn't have base desires, it means they're not the priority. Spirituality (which doesn't mean praying or church necessarily, it means figuring out who you are and what your connection to this world or others are) is the priority.
When you flip the star over and get the goat head pentagram, what you need to remember is that you're still looking at THE SAME THING. The two legs forming a stable base get thrust into the air as horns, and the direction of the spiritual journey goes from up to down, because it gets thrust down into the ground because it's less important now.
The difference between a spiritual journey and a demonic life is simply priority.
It's why all the monks and religious wise men are so anti sex. Sex is a base desire.
I think they take it too far though. Just remember we're in this world but not OF it.
You can play around while you're here but that's not why you're here. We have a higher calling. I wish it were easier to know what that is...
Wow. Great post. Thank you for this.
The bad guys know all of this stuff.
It's occulted information. (as in "the occult")
It's basically... psychology? The enemy knows how you think and how to manipulate you, using ancient hidden knowledge that's today only a google search away but long ago would only be known by a secret society or an old master on the top of a mountain.
The best way they keep it from you today is by tricking you into thinking that "occult" means EVIL. Good people wouldn't lower themselves to study evil things, right?
Study Hermetics. Study Masonry. Study Rosicrucianism. Study Alchemy. Study Tarot (it's not for fortune telling).
Fastest way I know (which will still take you a long long time) is Mark Passio's What on Earth is Happening podcast. Start from the beginning, read all the books and links he gives you.
Most people here have their heart in the right place, but they don't know why they're here or why the bad guys are bad, etc...
In The Matrix Reloaded, they go see the Merovingian and point guns at him and he just laughs and says they don't know "WHY" so they have no power.
That's the big problem with truther movements in general. They tend to brush off these things because they don't understand them.
Anyone bringing up gematria on Voat would get sent packing immediately. I think some of that is total nonsense, but.. not all. Masons for example don't communicate via text. It's all symbols and numbers and they do in fact believe numbers have magical qualities.
Do they? I don't know. Sounds like bullshit to me personally, but... that's not really important because THEY believe it. You don't have to believe or agree with this stuff, you just need to know that your enemy does.
If I could updoot this thrice I would.
Hermetics was the most worthwile hole I've ever dug. Sometimes it is all just words words words on the page, but when it clicks.....it stays clicked forever.
Happy digging anons., You already know more about it than you think.
I like the way you think u/KarateBob, lots of occulted informations are hidden for a reason and the elite class doesn't want us accessing to it. Because knowledge is power. Let me suggest the lectures of Manly P. Hall for everyone interested, a great instruction manual for humans of all ages. Also, hang in there u/pnwhomebrewer you are not alone! ^_^
As a lifetime athiest who maybe found God recently... Well, I read your post and think it may have just made some impact and answered some questions.
Remember to ask yourself what you're getting out of the booze, what you're getting out of any vice really. A drink is relaxing but five ruins my next day. I'd just keep having more because that's what I do, I was just following a script. The script sucks though, anything that's that habitual is basically a daemon that doesn't even involve your sense of self anymore.
This feeling you have is God calling you. He has extended to you an offer of His grace. Answer that call, through His Son, Jesus Christ and He will lead you to where He wants you to be. He will show you that He is leading you, little things that are unmistakable signs, and your faith in Him will grow to cover your whole life. Once you feel like your feet are firmly planted in His will, don't argue politics with your family or friends, you can plant seeds in their lives and let Him bring them to the light and out of the sinful life they are mired in.
The life of sex, dope and booze is unrewarding for a reason. satan wants you to devote your life to chasing the next big thrill, the next fleeting pleasure. Once you plant your life on the rock of salvation, nothing in this world will ever replace that.
We will pray for you.
What u/Podingo7 said is spot on. You don't need to cleanse yourself before you turn to God. He does it for you. I am still struggling but the burden is different. I am at peace knowing that God is fixing me, sometimes a lot, sometimes a little, but He is always working. The time is now, the day is today.