I know there's been some that've known about the corruption for a long, long time -- much longer than me.
But I think I still have a right to say I'm tired.
We've all been slaves our entire lives; slaves to money, food, possessions...
Slaves to things hidden to us. Hidden from us.
I'm tired. So damned tired. Tired to the point of not caring anymore.
It's one thing to give up. You give up when you think there's no more hope. That's not what I've been feeling. I've been feeling an entirely different feeling, and I can't even just call it apathy.
This is a feeling only slaves who know can feel.
I haven't given up, and I'm not about to let the slave masters win.
That said, no amount of resolve can fix what is wrong with how I feel. No encouraging words; no pats on the back; and no reassurances that the oasis is just over the next dune. I need something more substantial.
We've lost friends and family that can never be replaced; taken from us in ways we can only begin to understand.
I've felt a release of caring. I'm so tired that I cannot sleep. Consider that sensation, for a moment; being so tired your body stops automatically breathing. So tired, so exhausted, that your body hasn't the energy to drift off if only to stop it from going too far and fading away altogether.
This rambling might seem dour... because it is. We have all lost people and things we've loved. There is a feeling that extends from loss or failure, where you can't help but ask "what's the point" in going forward. "What's the point" in keeping up the fight -- a fight where you can't even see the battlefield? A fight between Powers and Principalities.
I have one word to offer; one shining light that might dispel the despair:
There are many deceptions; there is only but One Truth.
There are infinite ways one can lie about what has occurred. There are even more ways we can perceive something incorrectly and believe that which is not so. But there is only a single Truth; a single set of events which have taken hold in the world, however fleeting that Truth might be in our eyes.
Once you sense that Truth, apathy melts away. Just knowing that there is something Real in this world of ours, that it can be known despite how imperfect we are in our attempts to find it, is but a single ember that can light the bonfire of your soul.
A Hope beyond hope.
...
See the Truth in your mind, the echo it has cast in the chasm of your heart, and realize that even when hope seems gone, with everything you know seeming to be known for naught, there is always the Truth.
We may never know every meticulous detail in every single event that has transpired since before even time took hold onto space as its spouse, but we can be certain that there was, is, and always will be a Truth -- a set of events that had occurred and have led to this moment.
That Truth has led to your moment. Circumstances that have led to YOU.
You Are.
So, even if you're tired, even if you've given up, even if you no longer care; the Truth is that you Are, and Are for a reason.
Some part of you still cares enough, still has hope, and enough energy to BE.
That small whimper at your core won't let you fade away, no matter how much you want to just stop being. It's always been there, and will persist long after your body withers away to dust.
It's the seed planted by God Himself, and it lingers in spite of hopelessness. It is Love. Love of your self. Love of others. Love of life. It's what lets anything continue to Be. If the Universe did not Love itself, why then would it persist?
The Truth is the path to Love. We are all some distance away from that first Love of God, on the path of Truth. Follow the Truth and you shall find Love at the end of the road. Turn from the path, and you will lose yourself -- lost in the Forest of Deception. A hell we each craft for ourselves.
Keep fighting. Keep Loving. Don't let the Forest swallow our shared Dream -- that one day the Truth shall be known freely, to all.
God Bless.
Stay strong friend, being awake is much harder than it seems. We are here for you.
I'm tired too. That is why there are times I don't even bother to get on here. I simply take a day or two of rest so that my brain can take a break, and then I get back on for a while. God gave us a day of rest for a reason, and there is no reason why we can't take a Brain Rest from this worry on occasion. God bless and stay strong.
The Truth is God's Word and it is the Bread of Life.
1 Timothy 4:5 KJV For it is sanctified by the word of God and prayer.
Being weary is nothing new under the sun
Galatians 6:9 KJV And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.
Revelation 3:12 KJV Him that overcometh will I make a pillar in the temple of my God, and he shall go no more out: and I will write upon him the name of my God, and the name of the city of my God, which is new Jerusalem, which cometh down out of heaven from my God: and I will write upon him my new name.
I’m sending you a yuge virtual Hug
I adore all your posts - your words logic and theories with much needed information written so well here ❤️
I know fren the feeling runs DEEP / has for many of us I hope you just know my words of how appreciated your posts are here means a large amount of Truth ❤️
You’re always blessed in my thoughts and I always enjoy the time work and efforts you apply to your work along with so many here - Fren 4 always 🐸 ❣️ 🙏
Feeling this too fren - thanks for posting the feeling I don't know how to convey. My spouse and I were sitting in a restaurant last weekend, looking around at all the joyful people chattering away after taking their masks off. There were others who didn't don the diaper but they had that libtard vibe about them. We mostly sat in silence with small talk here and there, but realized just how weary the knowledge of what's actually going on makes us, and how solemn it makes us too. I miss the lightness that comes with being blissfully unaware but I would rather carry the burden of reality over never questioning the narrative and staying small minded.
Luke 21:19 By your endurance you will gain your lives.
Awesome Fren!
https://bibleproject.com/explore/video/habakkuk/
Maybe this will help someone.
Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness? Romans 6:16
Joy comes from God's presence. Lay your burdens down, there's no need or place for them. Receive his great and personal love for you. Be renewed.
That's really an incredibly hopeful statement...
Username checks out?
A strong message about being tired. I hope it helps. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XNZtorSDw4k
Have you started prepping for empty grocery store shelves and water and power interruptions?
I find focusing on that gives me peace in the knowing that I'm doing everything I can to keep my family safe.
I've done as much as I can stomach to.
Saved even glass bottles in case we need to can things as we go.
I've lost family already. I was responsible, and despite everything I'd prepared, I was powerless in the end. Even prayer seemed pointless.
I still can't help but wonder "what if" I had done this or that differently...
Ultimately, though, I know things had to happen this way. That's the Truth I found. No matter how much we try to carve our own path in the Forest, there's only one path that leads Home. We can only pray for others to follow that path and avoid thinking they too can carve their way to their own false truths. We can only pray for others to find the right path. We cannot pray such that their feet are forced to walk as we want them to.
That's been the hardest part of it all...
Nobody in my family has died yet, but half of them got jabbed and likely now have vaccine-AIDS.
I attended a strata meeting last month and every one of my neighbors and their kids have been jabbed. ALL OF THEM.
Logically I know what has happened but I still can't comprehend it. I think I'm in the first stage of coping which is denial.
You sound like you've worked through more of this than I have. I can offer nothing but prayers for us both and our loved ones because of the dark days ahead.