Hit those knees to the floor. Pray. Earnestly. Hands clasped/clenched. Wrestle with God. Tell him what is on your heart and mind. The heart leads us astray. Confess your sin, repent/turn, a prayer that you could sweat blood, commit, give it all to God. Rise. Shoulder the burden. God is all around you. See the world for what it is. Walk the narrow path. Speak truth always. Allow the Holy Sprit to lead you in everything. Everything. Go NOW. Reject that ridiculous cliché that God will never give you anything you can't handle...what a lie. God gives you battles that break you. Sometimes this is what brings us back; a new focus...or we follow our own way. There are only two choices. Never Quit. Prayers to you and yours.
No one measures up. Jesus is the only way (teaching, sacrifice, death, and resurrection). Your debt is paid if you repent, accept, believe, and follow. Let Jesus be your advocate and the Holy Spirit your navigator.
Two paths. Morality or Salvation. ALL miss the mark. There will be a debt to be paid, morality...you pay. Salvation, your Advocate pays. Choose wisely.