Darlin,' no man is worth killing yourself over. It might seem like it in the heat of the moment, but he's not. Do you have children? If so, don't even think about it again. Don't ever do that to them - leave them with a lifetime of memories and wondering why you didn't love THEM more than you were hurt by HIM.
Bottom line, you are a unique individual. You have your own, unique set of characteristics. Everything from the way you look to the way you walk, talk, your interests, your intellect, your hobbies, strengths and weaknesses. There is no other you. The world needs YOU. There are people who love you and need you and want to keep you around. Don't let him deprive you of that.
I know it hurts. A lot. So much so that it's a physical pain. But you know what, lots of people (probably everybody) has loved and lost at least once. We all know how much it hurts. But you DO get over it. And eventually, like most people, you will probably find someone who suits you much better, treats you much better, and whom you love much better. Don't deny yourself that! Life really is short. Even if you got 100 years (unlikely) it would still be a drop in the bucket of time. Please don't miss out on any of your life time by shortening it yourself.
You WILL survive this. And you will eventually THRIVE. It does happen. You are made of stronger stuff. We are here for you. You know this community. Reach out to people on the board or through DM. We are HERE for you. Remember, where we go one, we go all. Hang around and see how this Q stuff ends. And don't even forget, God loves you far more than you think you love your husband. FAR more. He willingly died to save your soul. Please don't throw that gift away.
God bless and take care. PLEASE, stay with us and keep us posted. Amen.
Based on the likely responses from this forum, I'd suggest you post more details but less directness at c/Christianity instead, and then delete this one. We'll pray for you and I can speak more directly to your problem but you probably want to ensure you have a more supportive forum first. That's my first thought.
You know only too well that 'daily Flame wars' erupt over there, SR - but for now I agree that you could prolly help her get to at least physical safety, & empower healing of her other issues after that :)
I should have remembered the hotline number, they can be trusted. However since you've reached out to us as a hotline we need to help too.
Having seen your other post, I'd first say one can always be positive about one's own body regardless of anyone else. God has given you life, you've enjoyed it so far, and it's irrelevant if there's a particular disease or a trait that is different from someone else, because everybody has problems and things in life that are uncomfortable when we make false comparisons to others. But talk to God and thank him for what you've got because it's you and you know how you work best. The first step is to ensure you and God have the clear air, you're not mad at him because he knows what he's doing, he didn't let you get in an argument today to hurt you but because there's something great about getting to the other end of this incident.
He loves you and sent his Son to die in your place so that you could have life. Jesus suffered a lot to ensure that we don't suffer any more than we need for growing up as healthy sons and daughters of God. Trust him that he'll get you through and that will be your foundation.
Once you get past that the longer term question is whether he really means it (unlikely). More often a guy says something like that thoughtlessly because he's hurt too, and he may be suffering from some kind of inadequacy as well. If it was just an irrational explosion of emotion, then keep building inner peace in yourself and in God, and keep a little bit of distance from him in conversation for a bit, and the time will come where he can clarify what he meant. If it were an actual action threat then other considerations would apply and we'd need to know more, but given what you've said I'm hopeful it's just an idle lashing out at something about life other than yourself. Strong people don't break even when the world puts crazy pressure on them for 2 years.
Now we pray. Father God, you love Wrongthinkery and have created her to be loved even in these circumstances. Lord, we call out to you to heal her body and to heal her self-image and to heal her relationship with her husband. We ask you to place her on the solid ground at the foot of the cross where you have shown us your love, and to calm her that she can rest well in you tonight. Thank you that the pressures we feel are actually just light and transitory afflictions and that we can take all our emotions to you and be answered. We trust you to answer her in a special way tonight, in Jesus's name, amen.
My heart goes out to you. You have gotten a few really great comments, and for the ones from clueless people? I'm sorry. I hope that you are a person of faith and will talk to the Lord about what you should do.
Maybe he does, maybe he thinks he does, maybe he doesn't. You shouldn't kill yourself because he says he likes her more. Shows he is less faithful than you, no point to giving him some reason to justify leaving you by being able to say, " look how crazy she is, she killed herself. I'm better off." Because if he's telling you this, chances are he is NOT going to be hurt and remorseful at your tragic end. You should just leave, or better, put his stuff on the sidewalk and call her to pick it up. And change the locks.
Just when you feel that you are imprisoned by circumstances, be patient with yourself and realize that you may not be imprisoned at all...your eyes just wouldn't allow you to see the doorknob to the door to freedom.
Don't listen to the voice in your head that says you have no options. You have options, there are always options and free will. If you're worried about the future and how you will be able to separate yourself from this person and be financially independent, then consult with a divorce attorney. Get an idea of what your situation really is before assuming the worst. You may be better off than you believe. Also there are some social programs that provide financial assistance for people with long term illnesses. There are options. Look for your doorknob.
Even if you feel totally alone at this moment in time, chances are that you have a group of people who would be very sad if you weren't around. They are your support structure. Call some of them and talk through some of your problems. When you're load is too heavy many friends are willing to share the load just like you would for them when they are dealing with trouble. Even if they don't "seem like the type" who would listen, they may surprise you.
Speak frankly with your husband. Don't rule out that your perception of who he loves and how much could be incorrect. All of us have our view of the world distorted from time to time with our own personal insecurities...see if you can take a step back and logically confirm of deny that he is more "in love" with someone other than his wife. Guys are dumb sometimes. His ex-girlfriend may be manipulating him to make it appear that he likes her more just to screw with him. Ex-girlfriends are crazy like that. He might not be aware that he's a chess piece on her chessboard.
It would be an incredible tragedy for someone as amazing as yourself to have your story end here when there is so much more for you in your life and your future. Please give yourself some patience and think things through before doing something that you may regret or hurting people who you never intended to hurt. Many of us know of someone who killed themselves during COVID. Please, please, please believe me when I say that better things are sure to come.
I can't spare you the pain that you are going through right now but I hope that you know there is some stranger out there who wants you to be ok. I hope that this virtual hug helps you through your trying times.
Yet another reason to forget him right now, you need to keep your stress down. And keep your problems separate in your mind, don't let the causes and solutions get mixed up.
something off about this post it seems but assuming it's genuine, I have a different opinion than most. do you love your husband? is he happy hanging out with his ex girlfriend or talking with her or whatever they're doing? I love my kids for example and I wish for their happiness EVEN WHEN it doesn't involve me. the same with my wife and vice versa. she's dressed me for dates. we are 100% honest about who we are and what makes us happy. that's true love. jealousy and control and selfishness is not love imho. if you love him support his happiness. if you don't love him than you shouldn't have been with him anyway. I assume you've been together long enough to hopefully know him as a person. he's still that person.
frankly, if you show this much love and understanding and offer to him that you're there for him when he needs you as his true loving friend, he's likely to take you up on it and your kindness is likely to drive his ex bonkers unless she loves him and you all become great friends
Watch Coach Kraig Kenneth on youtube. There's lots of videos on what to do when your partner is disrespecting you, and videos on ex's. These will help you make the proper decision for your relationship.
Sounds like you are in a dark place but that could be health related more than anything. Clean up the diet, no white sugar no alcohol, No corn syrup. Then add back things like rhodiola, St. John's Wort, 5-HCT, valerian for sleeping. Melatonin for sleeping. Give yourself some time to heal and detox from diet and lack of sleep.
Anyone that wants to talk shit to someone talking suicide, I will ban. This is just fair warning from us Mods please.
Darlin,' no man is worth killing yourself over. It might seem like it in the heat of the moment, but he's not. Do you have children? If so, don't even think about it again. Don't ever do that to them - leave them with a lifetime of memories and wondering why you didn't love THEM more than you were hurt by HIM.
Bottom line, you are a unique individual. You have your own, unique set of characteristics. Everything from the way you look to the way you walk, talk, your interests, your intellect, your hobbies, strengths and weaknesses. There is no other you. The world needs YOU. There are people who love you and need you and want to keep you around. Don't let him deprive you of that.
I know it hurts. A lot. So much so that it's a physical pain. But you know what, lots of people (probably everybody) has loved and lost at least once. We all know how much it hurts. But you DO get over it. And eventually, like most people, you will probably find someone who suits you much better, treats you much better, and whom you love much better. Don't deny yourself that! Life really is short. Even if you got 100 years (unlikely) it would still be a drop in the bucket of time. Please don't miss out on any of your life time by shortening it yourself.
You WILL survive this. And you will eventually THRIVE. It does happen. You are made of stronger stuff. We are here for you. You know this community. Reach out to people on the board or through DM. We are HERE for you. Remember, where we go one, we go all. Hang around and see how this Q stuff ends. And don't even forget, God loves you far more than you think you love your husband. FAR more. He willingly died to save your soul. Please don't throw that gift away.
God bless and take care. PLEASE, stay with us and keep us posted. Amen.
Based on the likely responses from this forum, I'd suggest you post more details but less directness at c/Christianity instead, and then delete this one. We'll pray for you and I can speak more directly to your problem but you probably want to ensure you have a more supportive forum first. That's my first thought.
You know only too well that 'daily Flame wars' erupt over there, SR - but for now I agree that you could prolly help her get to at least physical safety, & empower healing of her other issues after that :)
Keep your head up. Nobody is worth that. You will end up in a better place after he moves on. :)
Got my ass handed to me hard… I got MS.. I tripped downs the steps and ate some wall.
I should have remembered the hotline number, they can be trusted. However since you've reached out to us as a hotline we need to help too.
Having seen your other post, I'd first say one can always be positive about one's own body regardless of anyone else. God has given you life, you've enjoyed it so far, and it's irrelevant if there's a particular disease or a trait that is different from someone else, because everybody has problems and things in life that are uncomfortable when we make false comparisons to others. But talk to God and thank him for what you've got because it's you and you know how you work best. The first step is to ensure you and God have the clear air, you're not mad at him because he knows what he's doing, he didn't let you get in an argument today to hurt you but because there's something great about getting to the other end of this incident.
He loves you and sent his Son to die in your place so that you could have life. Jesus suffered a lot to ensure that we don't suffer any more than we need for growing up as healthy sons and daughters of God. Trust him that he'll get you through and that will be your foundation.
Once you get past that the longer term question is whether he really means it (unlikely). More often a guy says something like that thoughtlessly because he's hurt too, and he may be suffering from some kind of inadequacy as well. If it was just an irrational explosion of emotion, then keep building inner peace in yourself and in God, and keep a little bit of distance from him in conversation for a bit, and the time will come where he can clarify what he meant. If it were an actual action threat then other considerations would apply and we'd need to know more, but given what you've said I'm hopeful it's just an idle lashing out at something about life other than yourself. Strong people don't break even when the world puts crazy pressure on them for 2 years.
Now we pray. Father God, you love Wrongthinkery and have created her to be loved even in these circumstances. Lord, we call out to you to heal her body and to heal her self-image and to heal her relationship with her husband. We ask you to place her on the solid ground at the foot of the cross where you have shown us your love, and to calm her that she can rest well in you tonight. Thank you that the pressures we feel are actually just light and transitory afflictions and that we can take all our emotions to you and be answered. We trust you to answer her in a special way tonight, in Jesus's name, amen.
I dont know if they can do anything for me, between the fuck up the add by hubby and fat chicks, I feel like nothing…
Have children?
My heart goes out to you. You have gotten a few really great comments, and for the ones from clueless people? I'm sorry. I hope that you are a person of faith and will talk to the Lord about what you should do.
You deserve better...dump his ass and move on. Hold your head up high.
Maybe he does, maybe he thinks he does, maybe he doesn't. You shouldn't kill yourself because he says he likes her more. Shows he is less faithful than you, no point to giving him some reason to justify leaving you by being able to say, " look how crazy she is, she killed herself. I'm better off." Because if he's telling you this, chances are he is NOT going to be hurt and remorseful at your tragic end. You should just leave, or better, put his stuff on the sidewalk and call her to pick it up. And change the locks.
Thanks guys for being there… between multiple sclerosis kicking my ass and hubby bing a dick, my back is against the wall,
Just when you feel that you are imprisoned by circumstances, be patient with yourself and realize that you may not be imprisoned at all...your eyes just wouldn't allow you to see the doorknob to the door to freedom.
Don't listen to the voice in your head that says you have no options. You have options, there are always options and free will. If you're worried about the future and how you will be able to separate yourself from this person and be financially independent, then consult with a divorce attorney. Get an idea of what your situation really is before assuming the worst. You may be better off than you believe. Also there are some social programs that provide financial assistance for people with long term illnesses. There are options. Look for your doorknob.
Even if you feel totally alone at this moment in time, chances are that you have a group of people who would be very sad if you weren't around. They are your support structure. Call some of them and talk through some of your problems. When you're load is too heavy many friends are willing to share the load just like you would for them when they are dealing with trouble. Even if they don't "seem like the type" who would listen, they may surprise you.
Speak frankly with your husband. Don't rule out that your perception of who he loves and how much could be incorrect. All of us have our view of the world distorted from time to time with our own personal insecurities...see if you can take a step back and logically confirm of deny that he is more "in love" with someone other than his wife. Guys are dumb sometimes. His ex-girlfriend may be manipulating him to make it appear that he likes her more just to screw with him. Ex-girlfriends are crazy like that. He might not be aware that he's a chess piece on her chessboard.
It would be an incredible tragedy for someone as amazing as yourself to have your story end here when there is so much more for you in your life and your future. Please give yourself some patience and think things through before doing something that you may regret or hurting people who you never intended to hurt. Many of us know of someone who killed themselves during COVID. Please, please, please believe me when I say that better things are sure to come.
I can't spare you the pain that you are going through right now but I hope that you know there is some stranger out there who wants you to be ok. I hope that this virtual hug helps you through your trying times.
Yet another reason to forget him right now, you need to keep your stress down. And keep your problems separate in your mind, don't let the causes and solutions get mixed up.
Find someone that loves you.
I think he does, but he is a bit of a dumb fuck…
Yeah, if you're not ONE HUNDRED PERCENT POSITIVE that he loves you, that's his fault, and you should move on.
something off about this post it seems but assuming it's genuine, I have a different opinion than most. do you love your husband? is he happy hanging out with his ex girlfriend or talking with her or whatever they're doing? I love my kids for example and I wish for their happiness EVEN WHEN it doesn't involve me. the same with my wife and vice versa. she's dressed me for dates. we are 100% honest about who we are and what makes us happy. that's true love. jealousy and control and selfishness is not love imho. if you love him support his happiness. if you don't love him than you shouldn't have been with him anyway. I assume you've been together long enough to hopefully know him as a person. he's still that person.
frankly, if you show this much love and understanding and offer to him that you're there for him when he needs you as his true loving friend, he's likely to take you up on it and your kindness is likely to drive his ex bonkers unless she loves him and you all become great friends
good luck
Watch Coach Kraig Kenneth on youtube. There's lots of videos on what to do when your partner is disrespecting you, and videos on ex's. These will help you make the proper decision for your relationship.
https://youtube.com/user/CraigN
Sounds like you are in a dark place but that could be health related more than anything. Clean up the diet, no white sugar no alcohol, No corn syrup. Then add back things like rhodiola, St. John's Wort, 5-HCT, valerian for sleeping. Melatonin for sleeping. Give yourself some time to heal and detox from diet and lack of sleep.
Are you out of yer fkn mind?!
A whack diet and drugs are the least of her problems. You're probably gluten free, too.
"Sounds like you are in a dark place but that could be health related more than anything."
Yeah, another case of a dietary habits causing infidelity. Shut up.
Herbs ARE drugs. Dont ply her with depressants and st John's wort is dangerous and shouldn't be taken. Too many interactions.
Friend is in top 5 top researchers/authorities on st John's wort and he and his colleagues won't take it.
https://www.mayoclinic.org/drugs-supplements-st-johns-wort/art-20362212
How did you deduce from her sentence that she has insomnia? Wow. Again, shut up.
Then why is he with you?
I had thoughts like this growing up. Step parent was always around on Tuesdays.
I always would come around to... She is the problem not me... she should do the world a favor.
Eventually I got away. She got to live a long and miserable life with my father.
Do you often ask people at the edge of it all if you can have photos of them to beat your dick to, or was this just a spur of the moment urge?