Hey friends,
I've read many posts here on this topic, so looking to this community for advice. I think many of our familial, friend, and romantic relationships are being tested currently, and I'm looking for help on how to navigate my own.
My girlfriend (who I've seen as a future wife) and I have been together a while and are generally on the same page with all this chaos, she is totally against what is going on. However, recently both our jobs became a bit stricter in regards to their vaccine protocol. She told me today if her work ends up mandating it she will cave and get it even though she doesn't want to. I've told her she has free choice and while I disagree I would never tell her she can't do it.
With that said, I see this as a pretty giant red flag for anyone carrying this mindset. Me personally, if I don't want something in my body it is not going in under any circumstances regardless of who's asking (family, employer, etc.). If someone is willing to cave to their employer with this kind of pressure, what else will they cave to in life? How many other external influences will dictate their decisions?
She's a great girl and I love her dearly, but this whole situation has me questioning and reevaluating everything, including those I'm considering spending my life with. As much as I "trust the plan", things may not get better anytime soon and I want people by my side with backbones of steel.
Any advice from the community on this? Anyone else going through something similar? Looking to keep this as an open discussion, all feedback is appreciated.
I think you should tell HER your concerns - maybe she doesn't realize how big of a deal it is to you.
Good point. Question is how to go about doing it. Her family thinks she's crazy for not getting it and if her work mandates it she absolutely has to.
I'm on the total opposite end of the spectrum, so my firm opinion could cause a riff between her and her loved ones (who I like as well for the record, we just don't see eye to eye on this).
Well, if you eventually get married, is she going to continue to listen to her family, or you/each other?
You might take it to the next level with her and see how she reacts - maybe she doesn't realize you are that serious, or maybe her family will always come first.
Either way, better to know now than later, and be prepared for the answer.
Best to you both!
She may not realize I'm serious because I've been open about it and said "I don't judge people for getting it". That's what prompted her response about getting it if mandated.
I'm prepared. This battle has prepped me mentally and spiritually for anything, I have no fear of this. Will report back!
Oh, i judge. Especially if they dont want to do it and still do.
You don't judge people for getting it, but she is not 'people' to you.
Yes, please keep us posted, and good luck! 🍀
Well, I brought it up and it caused a disagreement.
She said I was being slightly unreasonable and that we need to support each other through this stuff. I then flipped it and asked what if something were being forced on her kid, would she be saying the same?
I think I got my answer, and it’s unfortunately not the one I was hoping for. Going to continue the discussion but this is quite painful.
Oh man, I'm so sorry to hear that ☹️
It is better find these things out now, rather than after you're married and have a child or two. I hope you can discuss it and reach a happy middle ground, but otherwise, you should probably move on for both your sakes.
Its not the best sign. It shows that she's down with it while everything is abstract, but will drop her principles when the going gets tough - which is ironic because that's when we need principles the most.
That being said, we all have our end point OP. Most of us who are holding out are probably doing so because we saw what was coming and prepared. Because of that we have the free will to say no. In my case I've been red pilling motherfuckers for a decade on socialism, communism, and the dangers of state power in general (some here would have been doing it for many decades). I sacrificed, saved money, invested in SHTF assets, didn't use credit, reduced dependence on the government, moved to a more based state, etc so when the time came I had fuck you money and was surrounded by a based community. If I hadn't done all that I would probably give in too.
I don't know what your or your girlfriend's socioeconomic situation is OP, but we all have a choice. However the time to make that choice may not be now, it may have been 10 years ago.
Thanks for the help! Your first couple sentences is exactly where my head is at.
We're actually in an extremely liberal area, but I have ~2 years of expenses in investments I can tap into if absolutely needed. This is the hill I will die on and they will need to bleed me dry to take me down.
Life is giving you a great big present with a bow on it: the opportunity to see how your potential future spouse will react when things get tough. And it doesn't look good if you want someone rock solid that you can count on to stand their ground.
Many of us have not listened to our inner promptings and gone ahead and married someone who we knew deep down was probably not the right mate for us. When you're in love, you don't want to hear or believe anything bad about the person you're crazy about. But if you don't pay attention to the red flags, misery awaits you down the road. I hate to say that, but it's true. Even moreso with all the potential sterility/genetic issues if she gets the shot.
Seems to me you've already reached the decision on some level that this is probably not the woman for you. Marriage is the biggest decision of your life. Hold out for the right one.
Thanks friend, I appreciate your wisdom. I'm going to be honest and present my feelings, then let the cards fall where they may.
This test is happening on an individual and global level, God is most definitely separating the wheat from the chaff.
Had the conversation. Didn’t get the strong, firm answer I was looking for.
I swear, God has a weird way of boiling these global events down to an impactful, individual level. It’s not something I totally understand right now, but I pray one day it becomes a bit clearer to help make this pain seem reasonable compared to the reward. Not a fun time.
I say put it all out in the open. Tell her exactly how you feel and think. Especially if you want to have kids in the future. Let her know that you will do everything you can to help her find a new job. And if she still insists on taking the vaxx to keep her current job then you have some thinking to do. But at least you put her on notice. I don't envy you the position you're in.
This sounds like a good approach, thank you. She is very smart and has a great job and making great money for our age, but in my eyes that still doesn't circumvent your right to bodily autonomy.
I like this approach, will likely follow it. Thank you, friend!
YOU answer your own Question ! Do you want someone by your side that does not have a backbone of steel ! I think we both need to understand that it's not just this round of shots ! maybe she'll survive this round ! but they're not stopping , it's gonna be another round and another round and another round until they kill off as many as possible ! the more people who bend and get the shot the harder it is for us to stop them . the more that people decline the more it slows them down, and perhaps we can stop this depopulation murderous plan ! They will eventually kill her with this jab if not this round perhaps the next , it truly is Russian Roulette! If she gets ill or if she realizes the decision was wrong and decides not to get round two this winter or next spring she'll lose her job anyway , they're not going to say , oh you can keep your job because you did it the first time , that's not their plan! She will have to keep getting boosters until she's completely disabled or no longer here to submit . There was a post on here about a fiancé , woman , who went behind his back and got the jab , after they discussed the fact that they were not getting it. Every comment or 99 percent were Run , Run quick , I'm an MFT , I told him to run , she , was disloyal , and untrustworthy, he was somewhat making excuses for her decision! Your situation on the other hand is different , she's being honest , she's telling you she will get it! This is a relationship worth the time it will take for you to make a life changing decision . You are not married yet , if u were and she has life altering illness or disabilities from the jab , many 100 s of thousands do , will you stay with her ,, how old are you ? Is that what you want for your future ! To take care of somebody who is too ill or disabled to work any longer ! She will not be able to do the job that she risked her life for! She will be replaced, you both need to really talk about this , You need to watch videos of disabled people and read posts ,, there are 187 k comments from people grieving for their loved ones , she need to watch those videos and read the comments as if her life depended on it , because it does. She was honest with you , now it's your turn!
Thanks friend! Appreciate the thorough response. I will most definitely take the honesty route!
Don't forget to be honest with yourself most of all ! important , will you be able to live with this and most of all let it go if she does decide to get the Depop shot ? This could cause you a lot of grief in your relationship A huge tool for strife and division you don't want to argue over this after it's done if that's what her decision is
By the way you're very welcome you seem to be a very respectful centered young man I wish you the best of everything that this life can offer
Thanks friend, appreciate your wisdom. Conversation unfortunately did not go the way I would have liked, probably have some difficult decision making to perform here shortly.
This sucks, I want this to end but also have to remember that this is a larger plan. Just wish we knew what it was all for currently.
Sometimes the hardest things to do is to try to understand the problem from the other person's eyes. Instead of allowing the vaccine to be a divisive wedge, focus on her job. Can she find another? Can she get a medical or religious exemption? Can she stall for a month more? My son's employer had mandated everyone had to get vaccinated and to my regret he caved because his wife and her mother are both drunk on Democrat kool-ade. Now his employer is backtracking because so many employees were ready to walk out. So the policy now allows medical, religious and "serious personal beliefs" as a way around it.
Things are changing as more employers are being challenged with discrimination and wrongful termination lawsuits. More data is coming out daily about the vaccines being dangerous. Help her to figure out a way around the mandate by searching for other employment opportunities with conservatives who believe medical decisions are between people and their doctors and want no parts of mandating. These are smaller than 100 person companies that are not covered by Biden's vax push.
The other way is to refuse the vaccine and make the employer fire her. Then sue them for wrongful termination. Often they'll settle with a lump sum payment to avoid the messy claims being made public. Rather than judging her, try to help her find what she values most about her job and what she doesn't like. I'd also advise that she consult with a labor lawyer to assess her situation and get legal opinion of her options. Good luck to you both.
I agree this is a huge red flag, but these things rarely exist in a vacuum. I suggest you review your entire relationship with her to see if there are other things you dismissed or ignored as not being all that important, but which may actually also be red flags.
I speak from experience, as I had a number of signs I shouldn't marry my ex-husband, but I ignored them all, some because they seemed small, others because nobody's perfect and others because I was focused on the what I wanted to believe our relationship could be rather than what he showed me. It cost me 5 years of my life and I took a financial beating to regain my freedom.
Best wishes, whatever you decide to do.
That's true. Something this big didn't just come out of left field. There must be other little signs because this is indeed huge.
Thanks for sharing your story, I appreciate your honesty! What are your thoughts on other posters feedback that I should be honest and let her know that if she goes through with it I'll need to reevaluate our relationship? Should I even bring it to the point of ultimatums? I hate when they are used on me and I don't want to use them on someone else.
I'd do the review first, as if there are other issues that you can no longer ignore and that you feel are complete deal breakers, you might be having a different conversation than you currently envision.
If you want to have a conversation after the review in an effort to resolve issues, I'd make it about everything you've observed, not to pile on her, but to demonstrate it's not just the jab issue, it's a cumulation of things. She may be glad to know these things and want to reevaluate her perspectives, or she may just get mad. Either way, your picture of the situation would be more clear.
A positive thing I can say about your girlfriend is that she's been honest with you about her feelings, unlike another poster's fiancee who got the jab and told him after the fact. In that light, the two of you may be able to have an open and honest discussion.
As to your ultimatum concern, she hasn't gone through with it and you're already reevaluating your relationship. What does that tell you?
So we had a conversation. I want to be clear, this girl is one of the coolest ones I’ve met, extremely down to earth, and someone I could spend my life with.
With that said, she seems extremely unnerved by this entire situation and is genuinely scared. I can’t fault her for that, being faced with losing your job is a scary prospect. However, the principle here is that if you don’t want something, you don’t get it. No matter who is asking, coercing, or forcing. That is a belief I hold and want my partner to hold.
She thought I was being too harsh and said we’re supposed to support each other through anything. I think I unfortunately may have gotten the answer I was looking for.
This fucking sucks, for the record.
Thank you for letting me know the outcome, and congratulations to both of you for being able to have a conversation about a very difficult subject.
There are actually only two emotions: Love and fear. All the other emotional words we use are just variations on a theme. Rage, anxiety, anger, jealousy, hate, envy, etc., are all manifestations of fear. Joy, happy, bliss, compassion, harmony, contentment, passion (including for the things we thoroughly enjoy doing), etc., are all manifestations of love.
It is very difficult, if not impossible, for one who operates mostly from the love emotions and a positive outlook to engage in a close relationship with someone who operates from fear because fear causes one to make irrational choices, which become drama and conflict in the relationship. This is what you've just experienced.
She sounds like a wonderful girl in many ways. The love of my life is a wonderful man in many ways, but he operates from fear (a lot of emotional triggers) and I operate from love, and the incessant drama and conflict were an emotional roller coaster, which I cannot abide. Unfortunately, loving someone and being compatible do not necessarily go hand-in-hand.
I also think you have your answer and I congratulate you on knowing what's important to you and holding to that in spite of the current heartbreak because accommodating someone who can't be the kind of partner you want will only lead to more heartbreak in the long run.
You seem much more capable of trusting yourself and being true to yourself than I was in my mid-20s, and I admire you for that.
The part I'm worried about is the "she may just get mad" part. I feel sometimes these conversations just spiral into anger, which is maybe a red flag in itself?
That poster you referenced from the other day was my inspiration for this post, funny how many of us are going through it at the same time.
Anyone who prefers getting mad to having an honest discussion is demonstrating a red flag. I've known two people who were both very important to me (one a sister and the other is the love my life), and both of them would get mad when all I wanted to do was have an honest discussion to get things cleared up and for better understanding of one another. My observation of those situations was that they got mad because just in trying to discuss things with them I unwittingly said something that pushed one or more of their emotional triggers, and there's nothing I can do about their emotional triggers. Now neither of them is a part of my life because I can't have a happy life with them, but I can have a happy life without them.
The reason so many are going through the same thing right now is because of the level of pressure that's being applied to everyone, even the normies. Some people know how to defuse pressure and others only react to it with erratic or irrational behavior.
You sound like a very reasoned individual, sorry to hear you’ve had a rough go with loved ones. Pray things continue to stay happy for you as you sound deserving of that even with the pain of loss.
The pressure is definitely being applied HARD. We look at our leaders as the ones doing it, but I think it’s coming from something much larger and more important than them. I keep getting called nuts for saying we’re in the middle of a serious spiritual war, but nothing else makes sense when trying to describe what’s going on.
Thankful for you and everyone here, some of these responses have been extremely wise and helpful to this 20 something. Knew I’d get some intelligent feedback when I made this post!
I agree with your spiritual war perspective.
She doesn’t want to do it...but will if she is forced? For a job??? Does she have no principles??
Sorry...i get so annoyed when people don’t want to do it and get bullied in to it. They are weak.
Correct. Which is why I posted this. She’s also tired of judgement from friends, etc.
In my eyes, if you back down to that, what else will you back down to in life? Principles are most important.
True dat. 🙏🏻❤️
Tell her your concerns and show her as much evidence as you can. If that does not work go to a wal mart or walgreens or whatever to get the vax. Not a doctors office. Offer the person giving the vax 500.00 dollars to throw it in the garbage and mark her as vaxxed. If that does not work I am out of ideas. Its getting ugly out there. IMO, most people would risk "vaxxing"you for 500. Some wont. Most people that don't want the vax because of the principle of the thing. If pressed they will cave. Scare her with the truth...as in her life is at stake. Worse comes to worse hope for the placebo.
Not a horrible idea, I just feel like that's a diet version of "giving in". The problem here isn't necessarily the vax for me, while I do believe it's poision my larger concern lies in the principles of what is going on.
Since when can our government tell all employers they have to mandate the vaccine or testing? Since when do our employers have the right to our medical information? All of this is BS and that is what I'm worried about, the long term repercussions of corporate and government intrusion into our lives.
You are 100 percent correct, its like giving in. You are somewhat complying. Unfortunately its going to get a lot worse. People are going to start dying in large numbers because their immune systems can't fight the common cold...and we are entering cold season. They are going to use their pseudo science to blame all those deaths on us. If it comes down to not being able to eat or support my family, I will use that option before I go to war...or be forced in a fema camp or whatever they are planning.
I hope cures pop up before any of that happens, but all our predictions up to this point have been fairly accurate so we'll see. Just pray that there is some kind of plan!
Maybe link her up to all the women having problems with their periods? There are a LOT! There's info that spike proteins are being found in all kinds of organs in the body including ovaries.
Tell her you're concerned about that. See what she says.
If her job forces the vax, seek another job!
She's heard me talk about all that and read a good amount on it as well. I think she is extremely concerned about losing her job and us not having a "Plan B".
In my eyes, we don't need a plan B. My faith in God tells me that things will work out even if everything is pulled away from us. Our founders sacrificed much more than their jobs to give us the opportunity to pull this world from it's Hell, I will do everything I can to follow through on that. My employer will not stand in the way.
But you said you have two years of funds to fall back on. So what do you mean you don’t have a Plan B? My question is if she can’t have kids and you’re married what’s your plan B? She could always take a vaccine later if she really feels it’s necessary, but once you take it, it’s too late, you can’t go back, you can’t take it back, and whatever damage is done to her body will be there. It could affect the future of your family, how many children you have, if any at all. If children are in your future, I would highly consider that.
Exactly, there is a plan B. I have a cushion and can ride this thing out for a couple years if I absolutely have to.
You’re absolutely right in your analysis, which is why I think I’m going to take the honesty route that others have suggested.
I wish you the best FREN! It sounds like you have a good relationship there. I’m sure when she speak with her, that things will pan out. It’s not easy for people these days, with all of the Pressures involved with life. But if she really wants to have a life with you, I have children with you, then this is a big hill to stand on for you both. God bless you both
Kick her to the curb unless her blowie game is strong and then buy yourself a plane ticket to the Philippines. Now you know and knowing is half the battle.
everyone will need to choose a side.