Forgiveness means understanding and letting go. It does not mean giving second chances, nor does it mean making excuses for bad behaviour.
You can forgive someone and walk away at the same time.
Forgiving involves understanding, either understanding their perspective and why they did what they did, or understanding the limits of your current understanding their perspective and circumstance.
Forgive them, for they know not what they do.
For example one might forgive their father for beating them as a child, due to the realization of how horrible the father's own childhood was. This breaks the cycle, and creates space for better in the future... without requiring the father be invited to Thanksgiving dinner this year.
Forgiveness is about releasing your anger, animosity, and beliefs about what should happen to them for what they did. Likely what should happen to them isn't your business... Let go, let God, and focus on enjoying your life.
What they deserve is your heartfelt prayer to Jesus asking for His help in forgiving them. Consider them forgiven, as it has been lifted up to Him. Wish them all the best in your prayers, never wish harm or bad luck. that does not mean that you forget - that you let them gaslight you about what they did - that you let them back into your life once the crisis is over, when they deserted you when you needed them most.
I've found no-contact with those who are just too evil to deal with to be the only option that leaves you sane. Yes, they have shown their true character. Pray for them doesn't mean you have to associate with them, allowing them to taint your home, your kids, your life.
I know I sound cruel, but life is good without evil people dragging you down - find people of like mind. Hate to say it but I've found so many Christians to be really lacking courage and faith during this whole disaster.
Maybe it's just me.....my two cents, though might only be worth a penny.
True repentance is evidenced by asking for forgiveness, and by, at the very least, attempting to change one's behavior. If they are sincere in requesting forgiveness, then you, through exercising forgiveness, will expand your own heart.
Holding on to anger and resentment is like drinking poison hoping the other person dies. It just doesn’t work in the long run.
Holding onto anger and resentment continues to give the other person all the power, even if they don’t realize it.
If you are TRULY wishing to become a better person and more in tune with God, then forgiveness is like putting the poison in a box on a shelf with their name on it. You know what’s in the box is bad for you and you no longer wish to partake in it. It’s no longer in your system. You don’t forget; you just don’t participate any more. You take your own power back in an effort to become a better person.
Friend, their is so much goodness headed our way - lighten your load to make room for joy!
The ONLY person who can control you on this earth is you. Take your power back!
Forgiveness is something we all must due. Bearing hard feelings is self-destructive. Like drinking poison and hoping the other person feels the effects. It’s short sighted, and only hurts you. So forgive them and bear no ill will towards them
Forgetting the betrayal is entirely up to you. You saw first hand how these “friends” treated you when they felt they had the upper hand. Now see how they betray themselves when the role is reversed. I prefer the company of dogs to snakes. A dog remembers a good deed and forgives the infrequent slips. But a dog also knows abuse and will Raheem die alongside the side of the road over tolerating abuse
A snake is nothing but deceit
So the choice is yours. I do not tolerate people who abuse my trust, or are reckless with my feelings. Nor should anyone else, imho
what if Gods wish and the meaning of life is to go through exactly those changes and learn about ethics aka difference between good and evil (actions and thoughts /feelings? as long as you manage to do so in your lifetime , you can't be too late. it is also not too late for you to learn true forgiveness . don't focus on others , worry about your own defects like anger , hate, resentment etc. because when your time comes itll be all about you, not "the normies".
I believe you can forgive, but not forget. You are able to forgive and continue to separate yourself from them. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you need to be friends again, or whatever the relationship may be.
You will come to learn that much of what we knew was false. As they say, history is written by the victors. That means that in your lifetime, you were also duped and followed along at some point.
I think many of you grew up, like me, with this vision of America with the keywords that politicians gave us. But when you looked into things deeper, we never lived up to those ideals. It was an illusion. My whole life I never stopped believing in the ideals that truly made America great.
I hold some belief that part of the plan was to also humble us. What if we had our wins one right after another. We would be throwing it in their face, which would have probably led to civil war. I think that in the end, everyone on all sides will have learned a lot about themselves.
I am not religious, but I give you an inspirational metaphor that has served me well.
ONE EVENING, AN ELDERLY
CHEROKEE BRAVE TOLD HIS
GRANDSON ABOUT A BATTLE THAT
GOES ON INSIDE PEOPLE.
HE SAID "MY SON, THE BATTLE IS
BETWEEN TWO 'WOLVES' INSIDE US ALL.
ONE IS EVIL. IT IS ANGER,
ENVY, JEALOUSY, SORROW,
REGRET, GREED, ARROGANCE,
SELF-PITY, GUILT, RESENTMENT,
INFERIORITY, LIES, FALSE PRIDE,
SUPERIORITY, AND EGO.
THE OTHER IS GOOD.
IT IS JOY, PEACE LOVE, HOPE SERENITY,
HUMILITY, KINDNESS, BENEVOLENCE,
EMPATHY, GENEROSITY,
TRUTH, COMPASSION AND FAITH."
THE GRANDSON THOUGH ABOUT
IT FOR A MINUTE AND THEN ASKED
HIS GRANDFATHER:
"WHICH WOLF WINS?..."
THE OLD CHEROKEE SIMPLY REPLIED,
"THE ONE THAT YOU FEED"
I struggle with the same issue. I try my best to forgive but it's difficult depending on what's been done to you. None of us are perfect. I never forget the actions that people have taken (good and bad). If they are truly sorry for what they've done, then I will have a much easier time building a relationship again in the future. If they are not, I'm willing to walk away and never have contact with them again. Remove negative people from your life but pray for their souls.
This question is +everything.+
When it comes down to it, God doesn't ask a lot of us. Forgiving other people, and loving Him are all He wants us to do. When we can do those 2 things, the other stuff kinda falls into place.
And yet- simple but not easy.
I start by praying for the people I'm still mad at. I pray that no matter what happens here on earth, whether we can fix the relationship or not: that all 100% of us will be in Heaven with Christ in eternity.
Q says we were chosen for a reason. 🤷♀️ We're awake to help some of the NPCs to find reality. I don't know why they're so slow to wake up and cling to the comforting lies, but not helpful for me to be mad about that. We have more, so God needs more from us. Bigger hearts, more generosity of spirit. Take all the solitude you need to get there, tho...
We have to remember that they were victims of the DS and their brainwashing. When they wake up, it should be a cause for celebration. Remember, the good shepherd left the 99 sheep to go searching for the one sheep that was lost. There was much rejoicing when the lost sheep was found. God rejoices when the lost are found. We are His children and no parent wants to lose a child.
Also, read the story of the prodigal son and note the reaction of his brother, the older son:
It’s a difficult thing my fren. This is something man has been struggling with for years. Thankfully Jesus taught us to forgive other people who trespass against us. Why? Because we would treat others as we’d like to be treated. You’re onto something about it being Christly.
Now comes the hard part. Letting go. Believe me, I understand what resent is. My right shoulder was damaged by a bully from when I was 17yrs old. I’m nearly 40 and my shoulder still aches and pops and clicks. I had dreamed of point blank 12gage blast to his shoulder for years. Then, once I started to go to church this year, I found out that it’s nothing but baggage. Emotional, mental, spiritual baggage. It was time for me to let go. Because, to be honest, if I saw that jerk starving to death. Well, at this point in the space time continuum, I’d toss him a granola bar. The world is very dark, and it’s going to get a lot darker. Be the light in the darkness.
But there is a breaking point. Where some are just too far gone to redeem. Where they’ve aligned themselves against you and have no plans to be your friend. It’s not that they don’t want to be your friend, but it’s that they’d rather you die. Someone who would rather deprive you of life is known as an enemy, and someone who would deprive another of life is evil. You may have lost some of them forever, but the flip side is the ones that come back seeking redemption are the ones worth forgiveness. It becomes your duty to instruct them. This is known as a “Spiritual work of Mercy”, to “Instruct the Ignorant”. This is what the great awakening is all about.
I think the best way to approach this is: "Do you deserve it?"
What do you want the answer to that question to be? Consider how you feel regarding that when you consider what forgiveness others might be granted by you. Do they deserve forgiveness? Probably not and that is the generosity of the position of forgiveness.
Forgiveness means understanding and letting go. It does not mean giving second chances, nor does it mean making excuses for bad behaviour. You can forgive someone and walk away at the same time.
Forgiving involves understanding, either understanding their perspective and why they did what they did, or understanding the limits of your current understanding their perspective and circumstance.
Forgive them, for they know not what they do.
For example one might forgive their father for beating them as a child, due to the realization of how horrible the father's own childhood was. This breaks the cycle, and creates space for better in the future... without requiring the father be invited to Thanksgiving dinner this year.
Forgiveness is about releasing your anger, animosity, and beliefs about what should happen to them for what they did. Likely what should happen to them isn't your business... Let go, let God, and focus on enjoying your life.
Blessings for you are wise fren....
Thank you fren :)
🙏 and blessings fren...
Great answer
Thank you. I needed that.
No...they deserve none of you.
What they deserve is your heartfelt prayer to Jesus asking for His help in forgiving them. Consider them forgiven, as it has been lifted up to Him. Wish them all the best in your prayers, never wish harm or bad luck. that does not mean that you forget - that you let them gaslight you about what they did - that you let them back into your life once the crisis is over, when they deserted you when you needed them most.
I've found no-contact with those who are just too evil to deal with to be the only option that leaves you sane. Yes, they have shown their true character. Pray for them doesn't mean you have to associate with them, allowing them to taint your home, your kids, your life.
I know I sound cruel, but life is good without evil people dragging you down - find people of like mind. Hate to say it but I've found so many Christians to be really lacking courage and faith during this whole disaster.
Maybe it's just me.....my two cents, though might only be worth a penny.
True repentance is evidenced by asking for forgiveness, and by, at the very least, attempting to change one's behavior. If they are sincere in requesting forgiveness, then you, through exercising forgiveness, will expand your own heart.
Holding on to anger and resentment is like drinking poison hoping the other person dies. It just doesn’t work in the long run.
Holding onto anger and resentment continues to give the other person all the power, even if they don’t realize it.
If you are TRULY wishing to become a better person and more in tune with God, then forgiveness is like putting the poison in a box on a shelf with their name on it. You know what’s in the box is bad for you and you no longer wish to partake in it. It’s no longer in your system. You don’t forget; you just don’t participate any more. You take your own power back in an effort to become a better person.
Friend, their is so much goodness headed our way - lighten your load to make room for joy!
The ONLY person who can control you on this earth is you. Take your power back!
I'll worry about forgiving if we survive this.
There are two very different issues at play
Forgiveness is something we all must due. Bearing hard feelings is self-destructive. Like drinking poison and hoping the other person feels the effects. It’s short sighted, and only hurts you. So forgive them and bear no ill will towards them
Forgetting the betrayal is entirely up to you. You saw first hand how these “friends” treated you when they felt they had the upper hand. Now see how they betray themselves when the role is reversed. I prefer the company of dogs to snakes. A dog remembers a good deed and forgives the infrequent slips. But a dog also knows abuse and will Raheem die alongside the side of the road over tolerating abuse
A snake is nothing but deceit
So the choice is yours. I do not tolerate people who abuse my trust, or are reckless with my feelings. Nor should anyone else, imho
Why would you resent that someone woke up later than you did?
Did you have an active role in waking yourself up, i.e. did you just one day decide to wake yourself up?
Why did you wake up when others didn't? Was it because you are smarter than others? Better than others?
I have not yet heard a good explanation for why one person woke up but another didn't.
🙌🙌🙌
what if Gods wish and the meaning of life is to go through exactly those changes and learn about ethics aka difference between good and evil (actions and thoughts /feelings? as long as you manage to do so in your lifetime , you can't be too late. it is also not too late for you to learn true forgiveness . don't focus on others , worry about your own defects like anger , hate, resentment etc. because when your time comes itll be all about you, not "the normies".
I believe you can forgive, but not forget. You are able to forgive and continue to separate yourself from them. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you need to be friends again, or whatever the relationship may be.
You will come to learn that much of what we knew was false. As they say, history is written by the victors. That means that in your lifetime, you were also duped and followed along at some point.
I think many of you grew up, like me, with this vision of America with the keywords that politicians gave us. But when you looked into things deeper, we never lived up to those ideals. It was an illusion. My whole life I never stopped believing in the ideals that truly made America great.
I hold some belief that part of the plan was to also humble us. What if we had our wins one right after another. We would be throwing it in their face, which would have probably led to civil war. I think that in the end, everyone on all sides will have learned a lot about themselves.
I am not religious, but I give you an inspirational metaphor that has served me well.
ONE EVENING, AN ELDERLY CHEROKEE BRAVE TOLD HIS GRANDSON ABOUT A BATTLE THAT GOES ON INSIDE PEOPLE.
HE SAID "MY SON, THE BATTLE IS BETWEEN TWO 'WOLVES' INSIDE US ALL. ONE IS EVIL. IT IS ANGER, ENVY, JEALOUSY, SORROW, REGRET, GREED, ARROGANCE, SELF-PITY, GUILT, RESENTMENT, INFERIORITY, LIES, FALSE PRIDE, SUPERIORITY, AND EGO.
THE OTHER IS GOOD. IT IS JOY, PEACE LOVE, HOPE SERENITY, HUMILITY, KINDNESS, BENEVOLENCE, EMPATHY, GENEROSITY, TRUTH, COMPASSION AND FAITH."
THE GRANDSON THOUGH ABOUT IT FOR A MINUTE AND THEN ASKED HIS GRANDFATHER:
"WHICH WOLF WINS?..."
THE OLD CHEROKEE SIMPLY REPLIED, "THE ONE THAT YOU FEED"
I struggle with the same issue. I try my best to forgive but it's difficult depending on what's been done to you. None of us are perfect. I never forget the actions that people have taken (good and bad). If they are truly sorry for what they've done, then I will have a much easier time building a relationship again in the future. If they are not, I'm willing to walk away and never have contact with them again. Remove negative people from your life but pray for their souls.
This question is +everything.+ When it comes down to it, God doesn't ask a lot of us. Forgiving other people, and loving Him are all He wants us to do. When we can do those 2 things, the other stuff kinda falls into place. And yet- simple but not easy. I start by praying for the people I'm still mad at. I pray that no matter what happens here on earth, whether we can fix the relationship or not: that all 100% of us will be in Heaven with Christ in eternity. Q says we were chosen for a reason. 🤷♀️ We're awake to help some of the NPCs to find reality. I don't know why they're so slow to wake up and cling to the comforting lies, but not helpful for me to be mad about that. We have more, so God needs more from us. Bigger hearts, more generosity of spirit. Take all the solitude you need to get there, tho...
We have to remember that they were victims of the DS and their brainwashing. When they wake up, it should be a cause for celebration. Remember, the good shepherd left the 99 sheep to go searching for the one sheep that was lost. There was much rejoicing when the lost sheep was found. God rejoices when the lost are found. We are His children and no parent wants to lose a child.
Also, read the story of the prodigal son and note the reaction of his brother, the older son:
https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Luke%2015:11-32&version=NIV
May God add his blessings to this reading. Amen.
It’s a difficult thing my fren. This is something man has been struggling with for years. Thankfully Jesus taught us to forgive other people who trespass against us. Why? Because we would treat others as we’d like to be treated. You’re onto something about it being Christly.
Now comes the hard part. Letting go. Believe me, I understand what resent is. My right shoulder was damaged by a bully from when I was 17yrs old. I’m nearly 40 and my shoulder still aches and pops and clicks. I had dreamed of point blank 12gage blast to his shoulder for years. Then, once I started to go to church this year, I found out that it’s nothing but baggage. Emotional, mental, spiritual baggage. It was time for me to let go. Because, to be honest, if I saw that jerk starving to death. Well, at this point in the space time continuum, I’d toss him a granola bar. The world is very dark, and it’s going to get a lot darker. Be the light in the darkness.
But there is a breaking point. Where some are just too far gone to redeem. Where they’ve aligned themselves against you and have no plans to be your friend. It’s not that they don’t want to be your friend, but it’s that they’d rather you die. Someone who would rather deprive you of life is known as an enemy, and someone who would deprive another of life is evil. You may have lost some of them forever, but the flip side is the ones that come back seeking redemption are the ones worth forgiveness. It becomes your duty to instruct them. This is known as a “Spiritual work of Mercy”, to “Instruct the Ignorant”. This is what the great awakening is all about.
May the good Lord bless you my fren.
I think the best way to approach this is: "Do you deserve it?"
What do you want the answer to that question to be? Consider how you feel regarding that when you consider what forgiveness others might be granted by you. Do they deserve forgiveness? Probably not and that is the generosity of the position of forgiveness.