It’s close to impossible to not get to be attention seeking.

Oh, I don't think that's true. It's a matter of maturity.

If you consider the essence of our spiritual being as heart (the ability to feel, give and receive love), the core of spiritual growth is tied to growth of the heart. But in a fallen world, with parents who are themselves flawed, limited, wounded, we, as children, experience not a perfect love-filled environment in which to grow, but instead, at various points along the way, experience wounds, pains, and a lack of real love is a big part of that.

Although many parts of our spirit (mind) continue to grow, those left-over pockets where the desire to receive love has been unfulfilled (due to the limited capacity of our parents, siblings, relatives, community, etc, to fully provide genuine love), will manifest in various ways, one of them being the desire (need) to seek 'attention'. But this is a substitute for the true need, which is to receive love and beloved in/at those various spots within our heart that were denied as we grew up.

When we truly tap into God's fully mature love, and learn to open those wounded and painful parts of ourselves, many of which are not recognized and which reside in the unconscious realms within us, those needs and wants become resolved.

Then, as we resolve and 'restore' our innate capacity to give true love, those parts mature. When we can love unconditionally, and free of or despite personal need (or suffering), then we become more and more resonant with God and of course, Christ.

The hard part is that this necessarily requires confronting pain. Within our hearts, there are many rooms of unfulfilled and unrequited love that we experienced, and then forgot, as children. Re-opening the doors involves being willing to confront internal pain. In the same way that cognitive dissonance generates pain on an intellectual and emotional level for people, hindering them front confronting painful truths, likewise, there is an ongoing heartistic dissonance within, and confronting that is not easy.

However, by constant effort in this area, with the real love that comes via Christ from God the Father, we can, and must, reconstruct our ability to give and receive love free from the distorted 'needs', known and unknown, recognized and unrecognized, that drive the sort of distorted behavior that manifests via 'attention seeking'.

It isn't easy to be truly and purely altruistic, but it is the ultimate destiny of the human heart, if and when we choose to confront our internal crucifixions, and learn to love without condition.

I suspect it only feels close to impossible because its always darkest before the dawn: one has to overcome the peak, to walk the valley of death (internally), and that always feels the hardest when we are closest to conquering this barrier.

At least, this is what my experience tells me. But I could be wrong!