I have been planning on moving out of this cesspool for a while, i am in the process of buying some property in southern Oregon but now I think that is a mistake as well. This Friday, my county goes into “high risk level”... AGAIN! these fuck heads are never going to let this shit go away! So many cucks here that feel “safe” for having the gubment tell them what to do and how to live there lives! I cant stand it! The county I am buying property in is also going to high risk level. So I am not sure they are as based as I thought even though its a red county.
I lost my job at the end of January because I kept asking too many questions about the bullshit china virus shit that they didnt feel I was a good fit for the team. Been on unemployment ever since and my claim just expired. I put in another application and we shall see what happens. I have an interview on the 23rd for an electrical apprenticeship since I don’t enjoy working in healthcare anymore.
My spouse and I don’t really see eye to eye on really anything. My spouse is ultra liberal and I am conservative with libertarian views. I have been thinking of a divorce because we always fight and can never see eye to eye about most things. I just don’t know how to go about a divorce because of my Christian upbringing. I’m honestly nervous about going about it. But I’m not happy in this marriage and I’m not happy where I live. I always have a place to live with family in Idaho where masks don’t mean shit and libtards are few and far between. Not sure what to do. I have been praying about it and asking for your prayers too. Thanks everybody!
Don't divorce yet. A trial separation may be in order however. I think it is dangerous to make any long term plans given so little visibility into the future. In 12 months this planet could look completely different.
In the meantime, living with your family in ID sounds like a refreshing break from the stress. If we didn't have children and I had a family to go to, my wife and I would probably be on holiday from each other at the moment.
So many people on here don't realize how much stress this current situation is placing on families. While I accept there may in fact be larger issues at stake, that doesn't ease the suffering one bit for those of us whose domestic lives have been destroyed by this attack by the evil, globalist forces.
I tried a trial separation form my ex wife. 4 separate times. Was married 19 1/2 yrs. First separation was right after my back surgery while in the Navy. We tried everything. Even tried to have another kid to see if we could have a girl, hoping that would repair things. Now, I'm a single father raising me kids on me own. The ex went back home to Bremerton, WA (to "care for her sick mother") and never looked back. (I get no help from her, whatsoever.) So, I ended the marriage. Her reaction was to report me to FL's DCF AND Volusia County Sheriff's for child abuse and drug dealing. Spent over 6 mths with BOTH agencies stuck so far up my ass, I could barely walk without having one of them notice. My best friend was raided, too. Said they were looking for cocaine. She doesn't sell drugs, doesn't do coke. Neither of us have...ever. The ex was just pissed I told her it was over. VCS STILL makes it a point to let me know they're watching me from time to time as they fly the Pork Chopper over my neighborhood. All because of a pissed off woman who didn't want to be a mother/wife anymore.
Sometimes, when it goes bad, it's unrepairable.
My advise is, leave now before there's any more heartache. A wounded heart heals.
Totally agree! Even those who are asleep will be awakened. Have faith and hand your troubles over to God.
You got my prayers fren.
Easy for me to say, but it sounds like a fresh start somewhere new would be best. Sounds to me like you already know this.
Good luck on ya
If you have the Idaho option take it. Life is short.
My friend I was on/am on that same path. Currently moving out and going through with the divorce. Me and her never saw eye to eye on anything. What's worse is most of the time she didnt actually have an opinion. She would just say what is popular. So eventually she started bringing up divorce and leaving me. So I decided I needed to step away and create my self again. Well that led to more fighting so now I'm moving from cali to Delaware at the end of this month. So that's my story I feel your pain. I am with you about it's tough because our Christian values. Plus part of me is ok with the divorce and I let myself feel bad for feeling that way. Like it was all my fault. Obviously fight until you cant fight but dont let it keep you from christ and your purpose. What does your spouse believe as far as religion.
Do whatever you need to do. You don’t need permission from anyone to do anything. Re-examine your entire belief system. It doesn’t mean question yourself and thinking there is something wrong with you. In fact it’s the exact opposite.
I’ve been through two divorces and life is life. I have no regrets because many decisions I’ve made in my life are based on beliefs at that particular time in my life. Cut yourself not a little slack but a ton of slack.
I always have a place to live with family in Idaho where masks don’t mean shit and libtards are few and far between.
You solved your own problem, congratulations!
What's the old line, " he went out to buy a pack of cigarettes, 20 years ago". One way ticket to Idaho, get advice from your family. You could always invite her in a couple weeks and see if the heart has actually grown fonder.
Sell everything, get divorced and move to Idaho. The first few months will be hard, but it will be worth it. Coming from someone who has gone through a similar situation.
Oregon as a whole will always be a liberal lead state. Whether you live in Portland or not.
I would not purchase any land in Oregon, nor would I purchase any land with a spouse that I had no intention of staying with.
Divorce is a serious step, you must pray and ask the Lord about it. But also, don’t get stuck in Christianity to the place that you stay bound in a situation that is squelching your relationship with God. And staying with a woman that you despise or can’t be around, you will grow angry at God and blame him for it.
I think one of the suggestions in this thread, is for you to go be with your family in Idaho for a little while. Idaho and Oregon are right next to each other, you can still visit and spend time with your spouse. Once you were a part for a little while, you’ll begin to see if your life is happier with or without her.
Just remember, the Bible says that light and darkness cannot dwell together. Just the same, I’m not sure a conservative and a liberal can live together either. Maybe not the best analogy but kind of makes sense. Is your wife a Christian? If not, the same applies with you and her.
To be perfectly honest, Satan has a huge strong hold in Portland Oregon. You need to get out of there, as quickly as possible. I have a feeling, that your wife likes living there right? It may be time for you to move on. But only God can tell you that.
There is a thing called unequally yolked and sometimes that’s enough to move on. Just my opinion.
Good advice, the whole west coast is screwed in my opinion, I was up in southern Oregon last summer, there are some red areas but you never have to go far to get to the blue areas where people are lunatics unless you're way out in the desert part I get. Being somewhere like the southeast now is a huge change where the default is conservative and it's just certain cities that are lunatic containment zones.
Good point. If you are considering divorce the last thing you need is property hassles. Going to visit Idaho right now to visit family is not a slap in her face that might raise spite. Maybe if you are gone a month or two she will move on some way and help you make a better decision. Good luck.
Idaho or Florida...but do not stay! You get one life on Earth, just one! Make it amazing in an amazing location surrounded by amazing people with an amazing spouse.
I know it's a long trek, but come down to FL. Te weather's awesome, the water's warm, and the sun is shining mighty bright over our State. Plus, we have Gov DeSantis, Trump lives here, Hastings is dead, and the best part is, NO INCOME TAX.
What’s the best area of Florida to live? I’m looking for a small to medium sized town far away from libtards but not necessarily in the sticks haha.
We moved from water main county to out west. Just do it. You deserve to be happy and not have to sleep with the enemy. It’s hard but if you’re wife is a leftist, she gets the vaccine, she can pass something on to your future children and to you. I think it’s a deal breaker but I’d say pray on it.
****enter text
Hang in there. Good luck on the apprenticeship; you're smart enough to dislike working in healthcare, you'll probably love The Trades when you pass the tests and get certified or whatever, and find yourself a good place to work.
Use your Christian upbringing to pray about your marriage until you get yourself settled into a job that gives you more security and sense of self worth. Work with you wife. Again, pray for guidance. But I'd focus on one thing first, and that would be a job and a sense of purpose.
After that settles out, you'll be employable almost anywhere, and really in demand and hopefully have to deal with less bullshit from your employers to boot. Healthcare is mostly ran by spreadsheets, not People making their own decisions.
See where you are after that. If it gets bad enough with the wife, I suggest counciling. Go on your own first (explain you want to work on yourself, your wife will probably appreciate that unless she's completely nuts), mostly to make sure you get a good therapist. You'll likely only get one shot at introducing your wife to a couple's therapy - so make sure you have a therapist who's not useless; so many are.
Best of luck young man. The fact that you're willing to put yourself out there honestly and ask for advice speaks volumes about your willingness to work on things, and your self awareness. ?
Lastly, I repeat. Pray. Be positive. Ask God for wisdom and guidance.
I’m sorry you’re having to deal with all this. I left Portland in 2006 for a red(ish) state and it was one of the best decisions I ever made. Good luck to you, fren.
You have already gotten all the " fight for you marriage" comments here. So I will say other things. As a Christian who divorced, AFTER having moved out of state, here is what I learned: I wanted my freedom from unhappiness so badly, I quit-claimed my house over to my husband. I knew the kind of environment I wanted to be in, and it was not California. I moved to The Black Hills heaven of South Dakota. I was never, ever going to change my husband's toxic viewpoint on what mattered to me. Did I condemn him or fail to forgive? No. Did I realize I needed forgiveness too? Yes. I did, and do, pray his life would bring him happiness and what he needed. Please protect yourself by being the one who files for legal separation first. Don't get filed against. You can get papers to fill out yourself for your state, and file the document, notarized if necessary. You need this while waiting for divorce to be final if you decide to file, or let your wife file for divorce. A paralegal can do divorce papers "do it yourself" (sort of) but a paralegal is still going to cost maybe 750. But they take papers to court for you. I never had to go do it. Easier for you if your wife files and you pay half. Can you apprentice in your new state? Best of luck doing so. I was in healthcare for 22 years. I left it and praise God I made that decision.
That is a good perspective, thank you for your honest input fren!
Never too late to change your path in life. As I encourage all my students never ever under any circumstance do you date/marry a leftist. It will only end in misery for you. Best of luck, it’ll be tough at first, keep fighting and appreciate your newfound freedom.
I felt the same about the place I'm in, it changed so much it no longer felt like home. Then I remembered an old saying: bloom where you are planted. If you believe that God is in control, then have the faith to see that everything is for a reason. Once you accept that, it gets easier: circumstances change us and help us to grow. See what you can do to serve God's kingdom at this time in that place. Strange how that changes one's perspective and attitude once you yield and become receptive. Not so long ago I HATED my home, now I love it in spite of the changes and see that some have brought benefits. ALL things turn to the good: stay in faith and be encouraged! Above all, pray and feed on the Word, it is the best remedy for all our problems and needs.
Divorce is always the wrong answer, except in cases of adultery, and even then the Bible is pretty clear. Jesus condemns divorce and he uses the example of a wife who commits adultery as a symbol for us in our relationship with him.
I highly recommend leaving Oregon altogether.
If your wife isn't on board with it, then explain to her the mental anguish you are feeling and how you just don't belong in liberal USA anymore. If she won't come with you, that is her choice. But divorce is not an option, and you will never sign any divorce documents.
What made me leave was realizing that the only moral action was to assassinate the governor of my state. Since I couldn't do that to my family, I had to remove myself from the equation, the same as it is wise to walk away from a fight. My wife wasn't on board at first (she was scared of living in rural USA) but she could see that things were getting crazier and crazier. The riots is what made her realize we couldn't live anywhere near the city.
No amount of money or comfort is worth compromising your ideals. The mental anguish and pain that follows is unbearable.
Move
Fight tooth and nail to get out of there. She don't want to go, make sure she understands the dangers in staying behind but go anyway. Good advice from others on the Idaho option. Stay with fam or get an apartment temporarily while you see where things are gonna go for you. You have options. You'll get through this. Just keep moving forward.
I will be praying for you. These are not easy decisions. It might help to imagine how your decision - whatever that decision is - would make you feel in ten years. Go with something you can be proud of in ten years.
On the other hand, also be aware that you can only control yourself. You can't control what anyone else believes or how they feel.
This Great Awakening has been tough on many relationships. Godspeed, fren.
Thank you, that is the point I am at, i cant change my spouses way of thinking, and the fact that my spouse demands me to change my way of thinking and beliefs really makes me mad. I cant be in a relationship like that. Id rather be single.
Well, being single has its own set of problems, but there are definitely times when being single is preferable to continuing in an unhealthy relationship.
Thank you for the prayers fren!
Saying prayers for you. I agree with everyone about going to Idaho. Even if it's for a short time. I think once you leave Oregon you will lose some of the stress. You will also find some answers. Your body needs a break.
Thanks fren, More and more each day i am seeing that i need to just start a new
I live in Southern Oregon and while it is much different than Portland it still reeks from the Dems horrible policies. I'm pretty much stuck here. I'm 70, single and living on SS. I would go to Idaho in a heartbeat if I had the means.
Everyone can afford to move. It's just that most are afraid to bunk down in a 10' x 6' shed for a few years. Too accustomed to their expensive "comforts". It's a mind trap.
A change of scenery might be best for you two. A long-term stay in a Southern Red State might do you both good. Take her to a gun show and just walk around among God's people... or dine out at one of our Southern fare restaurants... it's an infelicitous experience, and I don't mean COVID either. For most of my life I've lived down here and the vibe is great, especially during this COVID fakery. Sure we get the local hysteria from a few Karens on the "news" and the Health Department, but I just ignore it and live without fear or isolation. Here it's more optional, you can CHOOSE to buy into it or not, and I choose not to.
Folks here are plain talkers and straight shooters, and we have very little patience for the woke bullshit that seems to be infecting parts of the country.
The southeast is God's country, good advice
I am also near Portland for the moment and hate it. I want out of this state as soon as possible. I realize your wife does not share your views, but do you still love her? Is she still your best friend? What brought you together in the beginning?
Before you do a trial separation or suggest a divorce, I think you need to talk to her honestly about how you're feeling about everything. If you aren't happy with the marriage or where you live, tell her. It can feel very isolating to be the only one in a marriage with certain views, so tell her if that's how you feel. Does she have any idea that this is an issue between you guys? She might not realize how you feel, so before you dump her, try talking to her (it might take several conversations) and expressing what you're feeling...and listen to what she says as well. Did you do premarital counseling? Maybe finding a good counselor or pastor to mediate your conversations would help.
I think a lot of marriage problems are the result of poor communication and misunderstandings. Yeah, sometimes there are other issues... and maybe you will end up divorcing, but at least do your part as her husband to make an effort to communicate your feelings and work on repairing things before you write her off completely.
I personally don't support trial separations because you can't work on your issues when you're apart, and when things are stressed in the marriage and you leave...of course it's going to feel better and seem like the better option. Taking a trip to visit family for a week or so, sure that's great! But you need to go back and face the issues between you.
It isn't your job to change your spouse, but do love her and pray for her and be an example of Christ and his love for us to her. Get up and go to church every week, even if she doesn't (invite her every week). Pray for her, let her see you praying for her, pray outloud over her before bed. Refocusing your attention on your relationship with God will help you, and maybe help her and your marriage as well.
I care for my spouse but not in love anymore. Hardly speak to each other anymore. Been married since 2018 and things quickly changed right after the marriage with trying to change me and the sex was even a struggle. Haven’t had sex since 3 months after getting married. Not that that’s all i want, but it is a part of a relationship and I’m at the point that i dont even want it because i feel that there are going to be a multitude of strings attached.
You don’t say whether you have children. If you have no children, leave. If you have children, don’t abandon them, gut it out.
move
Join me in WV fren. Just bailed out of Az. It's beautiful here! People are crazy friendly
Well I haven't been married but I was in a five year relationship and the woman was kind of a leftist / Feminist and also insane, we were living together the whole relationship basically and once she admitted to cheating on me I broke it off and kicked her out, at the time it felt like my whole world was collapsing but now I feel like it's one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life.
Did you marry before God, using vows such as 'what God has joined together no Man may dissolve', and 'in sickness and good health, til death do us part'?
Marriage is an unbreakable thing, I viewed my first Wife's anger, ignorance, drug use, suspicions and her actual cheating on me as a sickness, and while I did want to divorce her I could not do it, she was 'sick' and I married her before God. She passed away at 40 with an aneurysm.
Move if you will, but you cannot just walk away from marriage, take her with you, build that Life together. It is ok to be opposites even, that provides some diversity right at home. My current Wife and I do not agree on everything, but we both try to uphold the Sanctity of Marriage.
If you take that electrical job you can always find work, jes sayin'. Everything you will need to know is in 'Ugly's', I wore out several of those over about 30 years or so. Good Luck.
https://www.uglys.net/
https://files.catbox.moe/e4h2uj.jpg
I'll be blunt -- it sounds like this site (and this cause) misled you through misinformation and fear, and ruined your life.
Surely you did before all this. What changed?
This site has nothing to do with my relationship. I had my conservative beliefs long before this site came into existence