About half a year ago I confessed to my church community that I am struggling with SSA and posted here on GAW. From there I have been in a 12 step recovery program called Re:Generation. First I must start with I still have this attraction and that is okay, but I am no longer acting on my flesh (No longer seeking Homosexual relations/Porn). I have been searching for the root of my sin nature and have found some connections so far. I did not feel wanted/desired or understood by men in my life growing up, and was sexually abused by a male cousin. Long story short, I see that I used sex as a way to gain that want/desire and understanding from men. Which I felt Wanted/Desired when I was abused. This is a huge eye opening link to what may be what started this sin nature in me. While I have not seen a change in my attraction, like I mentioned I am no longer acting on this sin nature of mine. God is 100% capable of changing this in me, I will not deny His power. But as say to my church family walking with me, I need to first be okay with the idea that I may never be over this attraction, never have a relationship, and never have sexual "gratification" again. This may be the thorn in my side The Lord uses to remind me of where he has taken me, or the thorn may be removed and I can have children and a family that I want to have some day.
I just wanted to give an update for those who have seen my previous post on here. For those who are still active in SSA I am not judging you, I love you all and pray God reveals himself to you as He has done to me. Im not asking for you all to do what I am doing but to just get to know the Father, Son, and Spirit.
Thank you for reading this, any and all of you. Keep me in your prayers. God is great and may His will be done, not my own.
My father had the same issue and struggled even after marrying my mother and having 6 kids. He actually had an affair on my mother with his best friend. He had a lot of trauma as a child that really confused him (sexual and physical) but chose to stick with my mother…this was in the mid 80’s so different time. He died not long after in a car accident but chose his wife and kids and counseling. It wasn’t easy and I truly feel for those who struggle with it. It was a big scandal in our community but I guess the scandal would be sticking with your family in today’s world. One of my sisters (woke lefty) said years ago she wishes our father wouldn’t have died and just left us for a man and been happy. Except he wasn’t happy when he cheated on my mom. My mother was his best friend and he always wanted to be a father. I would have been upset had he abandoned us for a man as opposed to having no choice but to leave because he died. It wasn’t his fault he died. Still don’t know what her point was.
What a beautiful story of love. Your father emulated Christ like love and chose his family instead of selfish lust no matter the gender ! TY for sharing , Your father gave you a tangible photograph of the definition of love, how proud you must be !
I truly am and because of his story I have compassion for everyone who struggles with SSA. My sister says I’m “homophobic/transphobic” because I don’t agree with the lifestyle and approve of it. I don’t think it’ll truly bring joy but we all have to make our own choices and we all will sin. She thinks it’s wrong to call any of that a sin. We make mistakes, repent and try to be more Christlike which is love the sinner and not the sin. I wish I had more time with my father, I was 7 when he died, but I’m glad I know his story and I will always be proud of him for surviving his abuse and being a better person. He never laid a finger on any of his kids. It’s difficult to explain to her, she drives me crazy sometimes. I made the comment to my more lefty mom the other day (religious mom but somehow is one of the asleep people who equates dem policies with Christianity) that I’m thankful I’ll never have to face judgment for supporting abortion/murdering babies. She doesn’t “support” it but she supports those who do and won’t listen/believe the evil they are doing. She thinks it should be “safe, legal, and rare” Someday she will have the knowledge that she supported such evil and that is not something I want to have to account for. I know I will have plenty, just thankful that’s not one!
Glad you told me what SSA is. For a while I though you had an aberrant attraction to the Social Security Administration.
Now THAT would be weird. :)
Thank you, I just want everyone to know the Lord. This is the path He is taking me on, I know others in the program who have my attractions but that's not why they are there, and that's okay. I see that and understand that fully. I was like that a few years ago but God changed my heart. Love them just the same as does the rest of the church family I'm with.
What is this “power of love and light”? Are you referencing God? Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ? If so, then say His name.
Understand God loves you, He created you. The world shapes the brain. Sadly. If you choose to live in sin...we all sin unfortunately, but if your choosing to live in sin, understand God hates sin. All sin. There are no big/little sins. And, if you want to please God, you should hate sin, your sin and my own, as well. Like the OP, you should be fighting against your sin. To accept sin as a way of life, well...that’s risky in my view. I’d be interested your prayers. Personally I wouldn’t expect any blessings from God, nor He hear my pleas if I’m choosing to go directly against Him. But that’s me.
Just worried for you brother/sister.
I don’t have the time to go over how wrong most of your statement was. Just know God has eternity...and you will to. You just have to decide to have everlasting life in God’s presence, or a eternal Hell. The path is clear with Jesus.
Also I’m not downvoting you. We are all in this together. With love. 👍
Well said🐸
I pray you get what you really want. I do feel that SSA can be natural.. but it's a low percentage of the population. I read a study years ago that often times the SSA son is not the first born. The mom's body provides more (male hormones I forget the name of the hormones) to the first born and less to the next son and each son there after. Also in Japan there was a study of SSA and they found that in high population areas it was more common and they determined that it was a form of population control done naturally. The cousin doing that to you is unfortunate. Also, some people believe that SSA comes from a previous life of being the opposite sex. Good luck on your journey. The problem also with a lot of the gay community is the lustful sex. They have like over 500 partners in a lifetime and one of my close friends can't find love because he keeps jumping in bed with them. I'm straight and I tell him.. don't sleep with him. Then he tells me it's not like that for gay men. But I disagree. Sex always advances the relationship. And for most it's just lust. If he was more choosy then I think he could find love. The ones I know in long term relationships don't play around, they are committed.
🐸❤👌
Good for you. I noticed you were molested as a child. It seems this is the common thread connecting the alphabet people. Every single gay person I know was molested. I think this is the dirty secret. The pedos are causing the alphabets.
You are correct, and the attraction may not go away, but Christ carried His burden and will help you carry yours. Praying for you and respect your bravery to seek God and change. WWG1WGA
The moleststion opens you up for the spiritual infestation.
That sounds about right from what I've seen talking to people over the years.
Same. Everyone I’ve met with a warped sexuality was sexually abused as a child. Broken before they knew what was happening )):
"Every single gay person I know was molested." But not every person who is molested ends up gay. I know a few gay guys too and they has never mentioned they had been molested.....
I agree. I know a lot more that are not than are or admit to being. I'm just saying it's perfect cover for the pedos to convince everyone they and their dysfunctional victims were born that way. Talk about misdirection.
This is not a sin whatever people think sin is. It is known the birth pill the gender bender chemicals in water and food and parasite infections all produce these symptoms. Too many hormone altering plastics too and medicines all work to do the canals plan to depopulate by turning women into lesbians and man to prefer their own sex
A friend in my church wrote a book it's incredible , he left the lifestyle and is married to a beautiful girl they have two children and he is a pastor . He runs a huge recovery program in our church and speaks around the world about the healing power of God to change your thoughts and desires if you choose to. I wrote to make it easier to keep in touch ,, more later ,
This is a wonderful post. God Bless you! There is altogether too much emphasis on sex in our culture. I believe that some people were born to serve God, and through the centuries we have seen many people become monks, nuns, hermit, and anchorites. They are serving God, and it is the BEST thing anyone can do with their life. When man fell in the garden of Eden, all the powers in him were perverted to something worse. If you seek the best thing you can do, it is to pursue a relationship with God. This is the one thing needful. Keep on this path and become pure, loving God. You have been chosen to do this.
Pornography alone warps the brain. I know first hand as I watched someone heal from a 13+ year addiction. It takes time to rewire the brain, but you CAN fix the damage. We are NOT meant to watch others fornicate, that’s why even though you aren’t “there” having sex, you’re still visually seeing it happen.
Males are naturally more visual, females more spiritual. That’s one reason why men are more prone to sexual addiction.
I’ll be praying you find the path our Father laid out before your birth, He has good things panned for you to do and I hope you have the desire to complete them!! May the Fathers hand be on you and the Holy Spirit be within you to help guide you in this journey of life.
Yes. My life improved tremendously when I realized the horrors of pornography. I have sit downs with my teen aged boys and discuss how they have, and will make the same mistakes I did, but one day they will realize and their eyes will open. No one in their right mind choses the life of pornography. They have either been molested, sex trafficked, drug addicts, or are in such dire straights that it's their only way. I tell my boys that by viewing it they contribute to these people's situations. I asked each of them to ponder this simple question. Why is it free and easily accessible? They gave me some pretty good answers, but in the end I explained it to them, how it affected me. It damaged my soul. It is there to damage souls and to hurt lives.
You are healed by his stripes. Will be praying for you victory.
God bless you and I will definitely pray for you. I ask that you keep us informed as there is nothing like frens on a difficult and lonely journey. You are a true testament to courage and bravery. God bless you
Toxoplasma Gondi - a parasite - can alter a personality - why do humans not have a parastic regimen for purging the worms......control...that's why
I have often thought that SSA is on a continuum, with some more strongly affected than others. Events in our lives may push us to one end of the continuum or the other. I think those with a strong SSA have a particularly difficult burden or cross to bear in this lifetime. Jesus is there helping you with your cross. Prayers for your journey.
I can't understand why what sex you are attracted to has to do with Right vs Wong, Right choices vs Wrong choices.
I am extremely attracted to money. That does not mean that I am going to let it rule my life. It does not mean that I am going to go out and rob a bank to obtain it.
If we allowed our nature to rule our lives most of us would be criminals of some sort or another. We have a will to do what is right. Robert E. Lee, probably one of the greatest men of history as far as his character when asked, "What does it take to be a great man" said "Deny thy self". Surely he was talking about denying oneself the passions of our natures, the pleasure attendant to our carnal desires, deny our slothful tendencies.
We do not have to be guided by our sexual desires over and above all other facets of life is what I'm saying. A man doesn't have to be driven to the point of abandoning and destroying an entire family simply because he got it in his head that he likes dick more than pussy. Is sex, and our attraction to one sex or the other so the most important thing in life. I say Hell No, and this is coming from a man who spend his adult life up till around 30 sleeping with a different woman every night , thousands of them.
Best of luck. I hope you keep us updated, I'm very interested to know if it's genuinely something that can be corrected.
It may not be corrected, God is able to, I just don't know what his plan for me this side of heaven yet. but I will deny my flesh daily to be able to better know and serve God.
You should look up Daniel Adams. He has a powerful deliverance ministry! I've been set free from things just watching videos of him casting demons out of other people. You can even schedule personal online video sessions. The reason you still feel the attraction is because there is a spirit there. They come in through trauma, abuse and our own willful sin. You don't need a 12 step program. You need 1 supernatural encounter with Jesus to kick out any demonic spirits and enjoy total freedom! God bless you as you resist the devil!
Bless you, friend.
God bless you for sharing and blessings on your journey. And bless those who are guiding you, they are boldly willing to call out sin and battle against it in a world where that is rare. Keep on that narrow path, it leads to life eternal!
Hi, thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing. I'm praying for you.
Lord Jesus, I lift up this person to you and in Jesus Almighty name I Bind and Rebuke the bonds and chains of depravity and sexual immorality and uncover and reveal the lies of satan and his evil dominion.
I cast you out in Jesus Almighty name and command you to leave them at once, NEVER to return. I slam shut that door on you and cover it over with the Awesome, Almighty, All Powerful name of Jesus Christ.
Thank you for sharing fren, I didn't read your last post but I'm happy your have progressed since the last time you have shared with the community.
Keep God first in your life as your doing, as sexual sin will always try to creep back in. Everyday in your prayers remember where God has brought you and where he will take you.
If you can direct your mind towards a more faith filled and purer life God will will lead you there. You will have dark nights of the soul, where it will try to make you revert back to a more primal nature bit you need to fight that urge, and keep busy.
I know this by my fight with pornography, they way we're living today is wrong in many ways and it's so obvious to me the powers that shouldn't be have shaped this world into Satan's playground.
That being said you showed great bravery and honesty in your post and that you have the strength and resolve to choose God's will over your life.
I pray all the best for you.