497
posted ago by 20-guage ago by 20-guage +498 / -1

Note: I'm an old fart pede, so what I tried may not work for younger pedes.

Had to take my tax documentation to H&R Block. Walked in without a mask and was greeted by a big fat black gal (you know the type, 10" fake nails, those big caterpillar fake eyelashes, and a ghastly hair weave) wearing two masks and sitting behind 1" thick plexiglass.

Her first words were "please put a mask on."

I played dumb and pretended I didn't hear. She says even louder "put your mask on."

I reply "I'm sorry I can't hear you with the masks on. I have a hearing deficit. Please speak louder."

She grunts and shouts so loudly everyone in the office heard her -- "PUT A MASK ON."

I say "I'm so very sorry. I have to read lips in order to fully understand. Please lower your mask."

She shouts even louder "PUT THE MASK ON."

By then she's hyperventilating and can't speak. So she leaves the reception desk and sends up a big tall black dude who's also double masked.

Wash Rinse Repeat

He starts to hyperventilate and lowers his mask enough to tell me "PUT A MASK ON.

I reply -- Medical Exemption.

He freaks and leaves the reception area.

The gal I wanted to see from the git-go comes up front, takes my papers without a peep and I leave -- Mask-Free with a Shit-Eating Grin.