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445
The only Covid test you’ll ever need🤪 (files.catbox.moe) 🐴 SHITPOST 💩
posted 4 years ago by penisse 4 years ago by penisse +445 / -0
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Comments (58)
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▲ 32 ▼
– RWB_PAPatriot 32 points 4 years ago +32 / -0

This is fantastic! I appreciate her conducting this test more than once for real data. 🤣

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▲ 20 ▼
– MakeAmericaWinAgain 20 points 4 years ago +20 / -0

Finally a real scientist

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▲ 3 ▼
– p8riot 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

On a serious note, beer and alcohol weakens the immune system.. so while funny, this test is counter productive.

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▲ 1 ▼
– Lenguado 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

My flight surgeon told me that a beer has all the nutritional value of a Pork Chop.

I believe my flight surgeon!

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▲ 1 ▼
– A_Lost_Fact 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

Unless its hard kombucha, full of probiotics!

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▲ 2 ▼
– Lenguado 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

I tested negative last night, and the night before, and the night before that, and.... Well, you you get the idea.

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▲ 7 ▼
– KickingPugilist 7 points 4 years ago +7 / -0

Midwestern scientists best scientists. I hear you can conduct it with cheese, too!

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▲ 1 ▼
– Darwyn 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

I don't drink... mmm Chocolate. Maybe ice-cream.

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▲ 7 ▼
– KickingPugilist 7 points 4 years ago +7 / -0

I am taking time off from drinking because I have a hard time stopping and wake up to find that I did something really stupid. Sometimes the things I say/do are really bad. I was knocking out 1.75L of vodka in 2 nights but often times as a bender from Fri night through Sundays.

I started drinking really young and did a lot of different drugs frequently from about 16 years old and up which screwed with my inhibitions and sense of "normal"

Idk why I'm admitting all this.

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▲ 3 ▼
– _thorn_ 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

It is easy to fall in to and hard to climb out of. Good for you, fren. I know how difficult it can be..

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▲ 1 ▼
– Darwyn 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

I'm too much of a control freak. I grew up watching my dad drink and do stupid shit. I just never started. Haven't drunk a drop in my entire life. Don't plan on starting. I have other vices though. I know how hard it can be to stop something you've gotten used to. Its like you said it becomes normal. Thing is you are probibly hurting people around you more than you realize.

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▲ 2 ▼
– KickingPugilist 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

I am. I slipped right back. I'm 32 and lost 2 consecutive potential partners over this shit. They were fat though so I don't sweat it much but I gotta get my shit together, man :/

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▲ 1 ▼
– Grady_Wilson 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

Admitting you have/had a problem is the first step to recovery.

Good luck with your recovery journey and may God carry you when things get rough.

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▲ 1 ▼
– KickingPugilist 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

I feel better than I have in a while having not drank this weekend. Walked the dog 4x already, hit the gum and will again today, drove to PA to pick up a bunch of weights and bars for my home gym so I can build it up more, feels good, man!

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▲ 2 ▼
– Grady_Wilson 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

You're off to a great start!

Keep it up, Fren.

It will only get better.

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▲ 2 ▼
– KickingPugilist 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

Thank you!

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▲ 1 ▼
– Island_Photo 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

Hot spiced cider works and is good for your immune system!

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▲ 3 ▼
– Callmejuls 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

Lol

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▲ 23 ▼
– AmberWins 23 points 4 years ago +23 / -0

I usually take a hot bath with a cold beer on Saturday nights so imagine my surprise when I learn I can also combine a home covid test at the same time.

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▲ 4 ▼
– Callmejuls 4 points 4 years ago +4 / -0

Lol

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▲ 3 ▼
– KickingPugilist 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

Baths skeeve me out, the thought of my back against a bathtub makes me shudder. I have no idea why. Swimming pool floors, too. I have to tread water or hop up and down making minimal contact. Like nails on a chalkboard for me 😖

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▲ 4 ▼
– Semmelweis 4 points 4 years ago +4 / -0

Sitting in your own stew is kinda gross, but I sometimes take baths for muscle relaxation.

I'm not a big germaphobe, Trump probably moreso than myself. He used to avoid shaking hands because of it and made some other comments in one of his early books. Public swimming pools are a no go to me though. On the nails on a chalkboard type thing, for some reason writing with old school pencils gives me that same chill, I always have to use mechanical or pens, thankfully after public schooling I didn't ever need to use a regular pencil again.

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▲ 3 ▼
– KickingPugilist 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

Isn't it odd how seemingly benign things can be so disconcerting? Touching fuzzy leather like the bottom of jansport bookbags is another one for me haha. I can snap a mousetrap on myself or have hot wax spill on my skin and I'm not phased, but fuzzy leather? Eek

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▲ 3 ▼
– _thorn_ 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

Lol some people go out of their way to have hot wax poured and themselves and others love old school pencils and sitting in the tub and won't think twice about jumping in a public pool..

And those people who are jab junkies..

There are truly all kinds of people. And mostly that's OK.

(Except when you're a sociopolitical murderous, greedy monster like fauci, gates, schwab, bezos.. or a pedophile like the resident, jizzlane, epstein, the 'art' collector than ran clinton's stuff I can't remember the name of at 3am .. edit, podesta the molesta.)

Those people can take a long walk off a short cliff.

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▲ 1 ▼
– JonathanE 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

The thought of chewing down on a cotton wool ball practically sends me into hysterics. If I ever actually did it, I'd probably die on the spot.

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▲ 1 ▼
– Lenguado 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

So you don't use soap in a bath?

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▲ 1 ▼
– Semmelweis 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

Why do you think it's called a "stew"? Soap+epsom salts+usually throw in a little bit of lavender oil.

I've wanked in the tub before, you can't tell me that the above magically makes things disappear!

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▲ 2 ▼
– AmberWins 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

My youngest son is the same way. He teases me that I'm "soaking in my own filth"

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▲ 1 ▼
– JonathanE 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

Does your son know he should eat his own scabs after they're done healing the skin underneath?

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▲ 1 ▼
– AmberWins 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

Probably not but the guy sitting in the next car from me in a parking lot last night seemed to think that digging deep in his nose and eating what he pulls out had some sort of health benefits.

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▲ 18 ▼
– 307Sleeper 18 points 4 years ago +18 / -0

Can hardly wait to conduct this test tonight. Thank you for the information, you have a trusting & honest voice so I can believe you.

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▲ 8 ▼
– LRAD 8 points 4 years ago +8 / -0

Why wait till tonight? Can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning!

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▲ 9 ▼
– 307Sleeper 9 points 4 years ago +9 / -0

Like the western song says, "some people say I have a drinkin' problem, but I have no problem drinkin' at all."

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▲ 10 ▼
– SirRupert 10 points 4 years ago +10 / -0

She has a future in comedy.

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▲ 2 ▼
– p8riot 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

Present. Future proves past.

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▲ 8 ▼
– 2ndenthusiast 8 points 4 years ago +8 / -0

Lots of foamy liquid yellow pills eventually lead to a red pill. u/#Demolitionman

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▲ 8 ▼
– Qanaut 8 points 4 years ago +8 / -0

🥂Cheers!

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▲ 8 ▼
– PROMETHEUS84 8 points 4 years ago +8 / -0

This explains so much, thank you, now I know why I don’t get sick, I’ve been testing my self for most of my adult life.

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▲ 8 ▼
– Heyohyo 8 points 4 years ago +8 / -0

I started doing this test at about 1pm today

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▲ 6 ▼
– Ltlgeneral64 6 points 4 years ago +6 / -0

Someone needs to show this lady how to pour a beer....

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▲ 9 ▼
– MakeAmericaWinAgain 9 points 4 years ago +9 / -0

She’s lived long enough to not give a fuck lol

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▲ 6 ▼
– GoldenFlame 6 points 4 years ago +6 / -0

Old lady still gives plenty of head.. :o

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▲ 5 ▼
– Hopiumaddict 5 points 4 years ago +5 / -0

I tested it and great news, I’m hammered!

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▲ 5 ▼
– KickingPugilist 5 points 4 years ago +5 / -0

Hammering out the virus to help stop the spread. My man!

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▲ 3 ▼
– Dirty30 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

That lovely,dedicated lady is truly amazing. Risking her life to research and conduct extremely important scientific research. She has shown us all the path to a happy and joyful future. A truly Great American! Thank you so very much.

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▲ 3 ▼
– bigsix 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

...and people wonder why I drink...

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▲ 3 ▼
– ChronicMetamorphosis 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

This shit was cracking me up. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 🍻

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▲ 3 ▼
– R3VO1utionary 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

I love that this got stickied

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▲ 3 ▼
– Humbled1 3 points 4 years ago +3 / -0

I have my covid test nightly. My wife cooks with a lot of "flavor".... Yup, still have my sense of taste!

Dammit....

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▲ 1 ▼
– JonathanE 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

Is 'burnt' a flavour?

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▲ 2 ▼
– oldtruthseeker 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

Honesty in science. How cool is that?!!

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▲ 2 ▼
– GA2A 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

Hey I’m doing that test right now!! Negative, thank goodness!

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▲ 2 ▼
– magavoices 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

This is funny because when I got covid I completely lost smell and taste. It's a very common side effect.

Since the earliest days of the pandemic, doctors treating people with COVID-19 noticed that a sudden loss of smell was a hallmark of the illness. As the vast majority of our sense of taste derives from our sense of smell, these COVID-19 patients also may have experienced a loss of taste as well.

https://www.uhhospitals.org/Healthy-at-UH/articles/2021/10/smell-and-taste-loss-after-covid-should-you-be-worried

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▲ 2 ▼
– fje33 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

That's a cute grandma.

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▲ 2 ▼
– deleted 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0
▲ 2 ▼
– Legally_BrainDead 2 points 4 years ago +2 / -0

Does this only work with beer, or can rum be substituted.

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▲ 1 ▼
– swimkin 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

I hate beer so I would do this with wine or whiskey.

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▲ 1 ▼
– Dudemanfoo 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

I have only had 2 covid tests today... might have another before bed...

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▲ 1 ▼
– pkripper 1 point 4 years ago +1 / -0

Currently on my 6th test of the evening. Might have to switch to the hard stuff in a few hours if these tests keep coming back positive. I'm thinking they're all false positives.

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