Flattery will get you everywhere. Wire me $1000 and I will give you access to my vault in Australia filled with gold bars and canned beans.

Plot twist: when the military finally steps in, the operation is led by Gen. Chat, who has 17 stars.

Usually I can tell, but is she the husband or the wife?

I'll be watching while eating a bag of chips with some Ivermectin dip.

I'd be curious if there's a medical explanation for it.

Barry Soetoro would like to know which are the seven states he lost.

I'll skip the story of why I started taking it, but one unexpected benefit for me appears to be a reduction in eye floaters, which I think increased after a bad cold this year. Maybe it is parasites swimming by. Not all gone, but much improved. Once a week, no side effects.

Encouraging self deportation is pretty easy. Cut off assistance to illegals and to “sanctuary cities,” and start handing out massive fines to any business employing illegals. Set a few examples of the latter and jobs will dry up fast.

When UFC has an “it accidentally slipped in” moment during a fight, I’ll just say I told you so.

What a nice job he did in explaining that. It's nice to see such a very polished speaker (no pun intended) for a Republican.

Where’s Nancy? In a few years, we went from Mike Hunt to Mike Johnson. Cun’t say nothing is happening.

It seems unfair there is no poppyvagina.

I have a modern day Andrew Dice Clay in my head saying, “Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack cut off his…”

...or Rick James-ed.

I think she was emphasizing that to remind people he's not a racist.

That's The Answer we've been waiting for.

Gives Ridin’ With Biden a [w]hole new meaning.

They do know makeup.

I think the back door is a more applicable reference.

I’m always more than a bit uncomfortable with a term like “chosen.” I am extremely thankful that I know what I know, and I also know I’m likely to find out I didn’t know much. Maybe another way to put it is that I do believe I wouldn’t be one of the 99% who would wind up in the hospital. Chosen, however, is a title I’m not personally ready to accept.

CNN viewers + MSNBC viewers + General Hospital viewers (or whatever crap the "big three" are showing) = 4-6%

Boosters are limited just to alumni.

A lot of blood would be spilled.

Someone told her a joke. "How do you kill a four hour erection?" "Look at Kathy Hochul."

They are turning on each other.

Still likely to be more coherent than Dianne Feinstein.